female fingering - unsuccessful
 

I have a friend "with benefits" who also happens to be the first and only girl that I have had any sexual relations with... When I tried to finger her she said it hurt and that we guys always do it wrong anyways. She is also a virgin if since that probably matters. Later that evening I ate her out and she only had one orgasm after twenty-some minutes. Is any of that normal and what can I do to make it better for her since she is already able to make it great for me.

Some instructions ~ Maybe you will find something useful there!

I don't always orgasm when he fingers me and not always when he tastes me either. Sometimes it just doesn't happen. Let it happen. I mostly get the big O from touching the clit. But that's me.....good luck and have fun trying

Practice, Practice and Practice some more!

All women are different. orry, no "drop in' instructions here. But it might help if you get her to "show you how" ~~ could be fun for you too. :D

show me how as allways worked for me she sould know how to get here self off get here to teach you with a litle show and tell
the fact is men can do this if they are shown how all you need is to listen to her but she needs to be open about this to show
what you can do is put her in charge "iam at youre comand"
she can lie back and order you to pleasure her
p.s. dont just zero on here clit lips and pussy get all her body
in the act to:cool:

WELCOME TO PIXIES mystical !!!

I think it's terrific your seeking help in this. You're a very caring, thoughtful lover. How lucky the ladies in your life will be to have someone who takes the time and effort to learn how to please them. :) As was suggested, have her show you. The best thing you can do is talk, asking what/how she likes it. And remember each women is different. Always communicate!!

Good luck and have fun! :)

Fingering tends to get too dry, and if you really don't know your way around a woman's anatomy by feel alone, most guys tend to miss the "button".

In my experiance, they also tend to think faster is better- Not always so! Slow and wet... if it feels even remotly dry, wet your fingers! In my own experience, if it stays too dry, too long, it causes small 'tears' in the VERY thin sensitive skin down there, which stings, and makes the meter drop to about -10, instead of +10.

Also, not all women are what the movies and porno's make them out to be. We don't cum the instant a guy sticks his tongue on us, we don't all get off during sex without extra stimulation, and we don't cum for 20 minutes straight, screaming your name like you've suddenly become God.

Take it slow, and take your time to learn her anatomy. Ask her to use her hand over yours to show you where to go, and what to feel, and what she likes.

As a side note, I've been married for almost 6 years, and I STILL have to lead my husband to the right places when he tries to do a hand job on me. It is almost inevitable that his finger will slip off the clit, and start rubbing along the side thinking he has the right place.

Like Gilly says, slower is better, especially at first.

For oral, I don't thinkg 20 minutes is a terribly long time, either. It depends on the build-up.

hm, i think it might help a lot if u talk to her. or better she tells u a little bit. it does not bring any of u two any further if she just tells u what u are doing wrong. but it might help if she tells and shows u how to do it right.

Muchos Gracias for the tips I'll most definitely have more quanderies down the road and its awesome that I can get some ir not answers, at least suggestions thanx again

ooh, i'm near PA. would it help if i volunteer to let ya practice on me? :p

Like the ladies said,go slow, lots of kissing and huging, don'[t invade the heart of her love too fast, play with her mound, her legs, thighs, kiss her neck, talk sweet nasty things, let her guide you. Remember you are doing it for her.

Gotta agree with those instructions. Demonstrations can be very effective for both. Saaaay! ! Osuche, would you like to conduct a demo?:D

i think every woman has her own way to feel sexual, sometimes she wont get excited neither by the same things or the same situations, may be you need to look for the right moment and bepatient, start slow, make sure you are not pushing anything on yur way to get into her and do it softly, you will moreless recognize when there is a spot you are stimilating and she likes it, dont be afraid to ask if she wants more, dont be afraid to slowly change the speed, but most important, dont be scared to make a mistake, after all i am sure you stil have a long way to know her body and her turn ons.