Wedding Tips
 

Does anyone have any wedding tips to make the planning process as painless as possible? I am about to start ripping my hair out!

Two word Vagas Wedding.

Two letters. J P

Hey, friends of mine took the payment from the bride's parents that were supposed to pay for a lavish wedding, went to a JP, got married, and used the money to put a down payment on a house instead. Pretty painles.

That would kind of depend on what you have planned for a wedding and what you're having trouble with. I've been around for the planning of two weddings and seen four. I might be able to remember something useful.

When Mayhem and I got hitched, we did the UK's version of a justice of the peace wedding. Sad to say it was just mostly about signing papers and legal stuff since all the immigration hoops we had to jump through took most of the romance out of it, plus he was still feeling the sting of a big wedding from his first marriage and didn't want a repeat performance. So, besides legalities there wasn't much planning or £££s spent.
~HOWEVER~
I *think* I have him talked into a romantic candle lit vow renewal ceremony in 2011 (11/11/11) and I am already planning things.

What I plan to do is daydream, write down any idea no matter how OTT it may seem, and then narrow things down to the least expensive way to do it, and to go into it with the mindset that this is to be fun and enjoyable for MAYHEM AND I, and not to appease anyone else. So what if I wear a black n purple corseted gown, n not white, or the ceremony/party is at night, it is about us :D Mayhem will very much be a integral part of planning 11/11

We are having problems agreeing. I am to the point where I just want to elope and say the hell with it but he won't allow that. What really irritates me is that he isn't helping with the planning process and HE is the one that really wants the ceremony.

That's actually kind of odd. All the weddings I've seen and heard about it was the wife who wanted to plan and have the ceremony and the guy just wanted the wedding for the wedding night. (Stereotypical I know, but still.....) Do have a color scheme yet? Start with that and go from there. You can find flowers in literally any color (especially fake ones which I would recommend due to cost). After that the tuxes for groom and groomsmen should match the flowers (though I would with a darker shade for the tuxes), white dress for you if that's what you want. Brides maids should make the men. After that as far I know it's little minor details. Though before I would definitely try to get your fiance involved and make him actually tell you what he'd like and find some form of compromise. Unless you've already booked the hall and sent invitations you can always push back the wedding to accommodate.

I suggest you let him know that if he wants a ceremony he needs to be involved. Be as diplomatic as possible. Let him know that if he doesn't want to be involved he'll have to be happy with the end result... which may just involve a courthouse and a JotP.

At first, I was really excited about getting married and all the wedding ceremony stuff. Now as I try to plan it all out, I detest the idea. He wants a ceremony because he thinks I will regret not having one eventually AND because his "friends and family would be disappointed" if we didn't have one. I finally got him to at least agree to a purple color. It seems the reception is the big disagreement. I want something nice and he wants something that looks like a cheap backyard bbq (in my opinion). I may have already told him that he needs to help out if he expects a wedding. At this point, I really don't care if things get planned or not.

If you two aren't on the same page as to how your wedding should occur then I say don't be getting married. Rather it's cold feet or frustration you need to take a step back from the planning and come to agreement about what it is that you really want and why.

As for my ideas, I'm on board with what Lizardbits wants in her renewal ceremony. I've done two weddings already and both were for the wrong reasons. My next one will be centered soley on me and my guy and what gives us joy. I'm even thinking the year 2011 will work for us as well. :D

Some men, myself included, are big on the concept of "little fuss, save money". This dangerous idea does not suit many women.

A JP is a good idea, especially if you don't have a deep church connection. The venue doesn't have to be a dingy office, a rotunda in a park is often nice. A short trip home for a catered meal in the backyard and partying the night away.

Tuxes are optional, tailored trousers and shirts with a cummerbund to tone with the bridesmaids go well.

In which case, the best planning advice I have is the proper application of a clue-by-four.

LOL. Well played GG.

If they're not married yet, it's not really domestic violence, just aggressive loveplay?

This unwillingness to engage in the wedding process is a poor indicator for the future.

BTW, purple look best in strong daylight. Matches the bruises from the clue-by-four.