Random Question About Dating Parents
 

Guys, if you met a new lady, liked her, had fun with her, wanted to get to know her more, how many of you would be put off by her already having children with another guy?

I guess there comes an age where the likelihood of a person, male or female, having had children with someone else increases to the point of probability but it would be interesting to know how much this would turn a potential mate off from someone they otherwise like.

I wonder if the responses from women will be different from those of men, since the majority of children from separated parents live with their mother. A guy would need to eventually be prepared to take on those children as a package with the mother, should the relationship develop that far. A woman going into a relationship with a guy whose children live with their mother wouldn't have quite that same full-time package to deal with as she wouldn't have as much contact with his children if they weren't living with the father.

I'm interested. What do you think?

In and of themselves, children – even teenagers – are OK by me. I would be concerned about how the children reacted to me. I would be hesitant to join a family when one or more of them disliked me.

Being a single mother i find it harder to meet men as i get older. as u say most who have children have them on the nights that i dont work fri sat and sun. most that i talk to are either totally off limits those days or want to run with their friends while i watch their kids. i have often ended up as more a babysitter than a lover. its one thing to lend a helping hand and to get to know and try to help guide the children when appropriate . as fars as my child i have to be w somebody a long time before i take them home to my child. i think that if somebody is responsible for their children and you can enjoy them and get along w theird kids u should accept the situation and enjoy it.

Without a doubt, it would depend greatly on the tastieness of the brains of the children in question.

You're a baaaaad man, GG.

As the child in this situation (my parents have been divorced since I was two) I never really had a problem with my mother going out with anyone. Never really cared if the guy she brought home liked me. When I got old enough to actually have an opinion though she did ask what I thought. Most of the guys she brought home seemed nice to me. They didn't treat me like I was a little kid, even when I was. Now that I'm on the dating side, I think it would really depend on the kids themselves. How they behave around me, and what horror stories I hear from the parent. I've met a lady and her kids. She wasn't to bad, but I couldn't stand the kids. They talked back, threw tantrums, threw stuff around the house and they were of an age to know better. I wouldn't date her just because of having to deal with that. I'm also rather young to be having to help raise kids half my age anyway.

Yer on yer own folks! :doorpeek:

You have only about 200 questions to get rock solid, then start dating.

I don't think I'd be put off at all.

She, OTOH, might be put off with me because I already have a wife (with children).

I totally agree with this, I would need to be certain the guy would be around for a little longer than a fling before I'd take him home to meet my children :nod:

jseal, valid point and I share that concern :nod:

Lord Snow, my experiences growing up were similar to yours, it never really bothered me and most of the men, if not all, were nice to me. I can't remember any particularly horrible ones. She married a good one :thumb:

citrus, it's not THAT scary :p Well ok, maybe it is :eek:

Oldfart, you've lost me :huh: It doesn't take much, I know, I just don't get it :o What questions and to whom? I haven't dated anyone new for years, did it all change? :yikes:

Scotz, the lady might be put off by the wife, yep :nod: Although if the wife doesn't mind...

My mother hasn't remarried, though my father did a few years back. That's a bit of a story and something I'll only really discuss blitzed and on "the couch". At this point since I'm all growed up now (age wise anyways), I just hope my mom finds someone that makes her happy. I'm no longer part of the equation.

now i always said id never date a lady with kids but recently started dating a lady with a young son (13)
he is great and we are like mates, i was the same age when my dad left so know what its like have men date your mom
i know he is part of his moms live and he comes before me
his dad has never been around since he was born
and to be fair i have had no trouble from him we just hit it off
the only trouble is the father (not dad ) he still see's the child as a weapon to hurt his ex, just spent 4 days there that turned into 7 cause the arse wouldn't bring him back, its a good job he's over 100 miles away is all ill say
the child doesn't want to see his father anymore, his father pays no matianace so thats that,

Don't know what the laws are there in the UK, but here is the states once the child hits about 10, they have a say in who they live with. Also, unless it's court enforced visitation is not mandatory for the secondary care provider. What's really funny about it is, one of the parents could be paying child support and still not have visitation due extenuating circumstances.