(Can't remember if this has been posted...but what the hell!! )









If Dr. Seuss Was a Woman, she'd write


I'm glad I'm a woman -Yes I am, yes I am.
I don't live on Budweiser, beer nuts and Spam.

I don't brag to my buddies about my erections.
I won't drive to Hell before asking directions.

I act nice at parties; don't act like a clown;
And I know how to put the damn toilet seat down.

I won't grab your boobies; I won't pinch your butt.
My belt is not hidden beneath my beer gut.

I don't go around re-adjusting my crotch;
or make sure my headboard bears each hard-earned notch.

I don't belch in public; don't scratch my behind.
I'm a woman, you see- I'm just not that kind!

I'm glad I'm a woman; So glad I could sing-and
thrilled I'm not covered in shag carpeting.

Hair won't grow from my ears, or cover my back.
And when I bend over, you can't see my crack.

I'm a woman, alas-and I'm proud, don't you see?
I'm blessed to have boobs and to squat when I pee.

I don't live for golf, or shoot basketball.
I don't swagger and spit like a Neanderthal.

I don't need male bonding; I don't cruise for chicks-
I'll never join the "Hair Club", or think with my dick.

I'm a woman, by chance, and thankful I am!
I'm so glad I'm a woman; not a man, yes I am!

__________________
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*Diva*



"Never shall I forget the time I spent with you. Please
continue to be my friend, as you will always find me yours."
Ludwig van Beethoven (1770-1827)

"Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away."