To Your Pregnant Wife

1. 'Not to imply anything, but I don't think the kid weighs 20 kilo's.'

2. 'Y'know, looking at her, you'd never guess that Pamela Leee had a baby!'

3. 'I sure hope your thighs aren't gonna stay that flabby forever!'

4. 'Well. couldn't they induce labour? The 25th is the Grand Final.'

5. 'Are your ankles supposed to look like that?'

6. Fred at the office passed a stone the size of a pea. Boy, that's gotta hurt!'

7. I'm jealous! Why can't men experience the joy of childbirth?'

8. 'Get your own icecream, Buddha!'

9. 'Geez, you're awfully puffy looking today.'

10. 'Got Milk?'

11. 'Maybe we could name the baby after my secretary, Tawney.'

12. 'Man! That rose tattoo on your hip is the size of Madagascar!'

13. 'Retaining water? Yeah, like the Hoover Dam retains water.

__________________

__________________
*it's all Christine's fault

Don't you think this is all a little extreme, Sharni?



J/K...that's a funny list...can you imagine a guy suicidal enough to address his preggo wife as "Buddha"?

__________________
Plug me into somethin'

If the theory does not conform to the facts, then the facts must be discarded.

No good deed ever goes unpunished

Never argue with an idiot. He'll drag you down to his level, & beat you with experience.

And how many of us really know the size of Madagascar? That Hoover Damn comment, though...that would send me over the edge.

__________________


"Life is too short to wake up in the morning with regrets. So love the people who treat you right, forget about the ones who don't, and believe that everything happens for a reason. If you get a chance, take it. If it changes your life, then let it, and if you have to wait for what you really want, take the time because nobody said that life would be easy. They just promised it would be worth it." ~ Unknown author

Ummmmmmmmmmm Mr. Lilith used to tell everyone to "rub the Budha's belly for luck"..........I'm still working on the payback

__________________

The practice of putting women on pedestals began to die out when it was discovered that they could give orders better from there.~ Betty Grable

If I wanted your opinion, I'd remove the duct tape and ask you for it.~ Me
<~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~>
One man's dream is another man's nightmare~~~~> §¤ Lilith ¤§
~>My Scribbles<~
==>Gone Shopping<== ~Just a Quickie~ *~A Celebration Vacation~* ~Surprises~ Sleeping With the Window Open
What Did You Do Today? Self Defense Class ~Short Sweet Snippets~ § Summer Spin § Story Challenge Submission Pajamas

Madagascar is about the size of Texas and New Mexico together.

Respect to Mr. Lillith - we're just overgrown kids you see - can't help ourselves.

__________________
Vigil, if you were my husband, I would give you poison.

Madam, if you were my wife, I would take it.

LOL Vigil!

Unfortunately, I can totally see my guy calling me Buddha, too! When he's dipped into the ice cream pail too hard for a while, I see him as a Buddha, too, though!

A truly suicidal thing is to walk into a room of ardent feminists

and ask "What's the only thing worse than a male chauvinist?"

"A Bloody woman who doesn't know her place!"

Nuff said.

__________________
Calm, quiet, smooth, devastating

Got milk?