My girlfriend and I have talked about having anal sex and she seems a little reluctant to try it. Any good tips on how to go about talking to her and also if anyone has tips about anal. I know the lube thing but other than that I am clueless.

Ok, well where to start. Ok first of all you have to make her feel comfortable. When you do start to get down to business, I recomend that you go down on her. While doing this, have one finger inside as you lick her clit. Then take another finger and slip it in her and get it wet. Then gently place it over her anus and slowly insert it in. Go like this for at least 5 mins. Then slide another finger in. Just as a mental note, two finger's is roughly the same girth as a dick. So she at least can get some sort of feeling for it. Make sure to get some lube and add some to your finger's. Then work up a steady rythem and keep it going.

Now by this time she should be "adjusted" enough for the real thing. Now before you continue if you decide to wear a condom, remember that it will actaully make you dick slightly thicker. Always listen to her for any signs of uncertainty and reassure her that you will be as gentle as you can and you will stop if it hurts her too much.

Use a position that gives you full access, doggy is very good for anal. Even spooning is good as it takes away any pressure from her by not having all of your body weight behind each thrust.

Then add some lube onto mr "big" and gently go in. Take baby steps here. Very slowly add more as you go in. Remember to go come back out after a few seconds so her anal muscles can contract and open.

It's just like fucking a virgin for the first time. Just remember that she is an anal virgin so treat it the same way. As long as there is communication back and forth from each of you, you shouldn't have any problems.

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Welcum to Pixie posting t labs!

While Mark (^^^) may have the clinical techniques down to a science...anal intercourse is different from person to person and from time to time. What is good in one evening, may not happen the next. It's not always so cut and dried!

I can't tell how old you are from your profile...and so I can't assume an age for your g/f. If she is young and sexually inexperienced, I can totally undestand her reluctance to anal. A woman can barely know her own vaginal pleasures if sex is very new to her. Time and patience is the key to helping her decide if she wants to experience anal sex with you. This isn't something you can "talk her into". Take time to please one another in every aspect of lovemaking...touch, smell, see, talk, experiment...but never force the issue.

Don't stop trying...and when she wants/needs/has to have it...you'll know!

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*drooling* mmmm...anal :lust:
for me, actually, i don't usually like it doggie style. we may switch it up to that later but i'd rather take him at my own pace, straddle him on my knees so i can lower myself down, this way i can stop and wait for a sec if i need to.

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errr...as i meant to add to that^^^maybe if you told, and could show her, she'd have total control over pace and penetration she'd feel more at ease about givin it a shot.

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Trees give peace to the souls of men * Nora Waln

The forest would be very quiet if no other birds sang than those who sing the best * Henry van Dyke

some fairly sordid tales, rambles, and anecdotes
Hypothetically Speaking * Something More * Cammy Interrupted * An Experimental Vacation * Masked * so..damn..hot * Thank You * My toy, his idea * no.19 Maple Lane * I Have A Surprise For You * Yesterday * In a Quiet Kitchen * help me decide * untitled prose * more untitled prose

I was really reluctant to try anal sex at first too. I had a lot of mental hold ups about it. Mostly, I thought it would hurt and be dirty so I didn't want to do it because I was a "nice girl" and "nice girls" didn't do things like that (how in denial was I? LOL).

Do you think your girlfriend might feel the same way? You should talk to her and ask her why she isn't into it, ask her if she's afraid it'll hurt or whatever. Just be understanding to whatever she tells you, and if she decides to give it a go be sure to treat her gently.

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It's a BOY!!

Oh just to add another 2 cents here. Remember that it is her body. And as such you have to take your time with it. It may take her months to get her mind ready for something that she may have reservations about. My first post still stands on it's own merits, but it is not something that you can "push" on her.

Put yourself in her shoes for a moment and you will understand why she is a bit reluctant.

Better still, remember back to your first sexual experience. How shit scared were you? How nervous were you of the unknown?

I think that most girls here will agree with me on this one; sex for guys is pretty straight forward. We get it up and stick it in, move it around a bit and that is it. Girls have a shit load of things that they have to go through before they will accept it. They have to get into the right frame of mind, their body has to get ready for it.

So if you are going to venture to new areas, then you have to understand her state of mind on things and why she may seem reluctant to try new things. I have given anal to girls before and as they were unsure of what to expect it was uncomfortable for them. I didn't force it. I made sure they were relaxed and they new what was going on. I took my time and we got there. It didn't hurt them, but because it was something that they had never tried before, it was uncomfortable.

Now if you do get that far and she tries it, don't expect her to be over the moon about it when it goes in. It may take the both of you many tries before she can enjoy it. Just take your time and don't be in a rush for her to do it.

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My husband and I didn't do anal until were had been dating for almost five years. For me, it took ALOT of foreplay and there was a mental block, too. I had make a concious effort to relax completly and keep telling myself that I trusted him and he wouldn't do anything to hurt me.

Remember it's all about her this time, although it will be a great experience for you too (so I'm told). Make sure she is comepletely and totally relaxed and use tons and tons of lube. Make sure somthing goes in before the dick to get her used to it, a toy or a finger. And did I mention TONS of lube?

Have fun!!

My wife and I have been together for 16 years. It isn't her cup of tea, but when we do, she is totally into it as long as I am gentle and slow.

When you talk to her, reassure her that you will be gentle and will stop if she asks. It took my wife and I three tries until we finally did it as the first try, we didn't use enough lube and it hurt, the second try, she remembered the first try and was very nervous.
She says now when we do, she does feel naughty and she like it.
Yes, go down on her and when she starts cumming, I would try a pinky then work your way up.
Get a very small dildo that isn't too fat and play with that the first time to show her how patient you are willing to be and that she can trust you. Yes...use lots and lots of lube...lube the dildo..your fingers....
Then when you two are ready, use lots of lube on his...I recommend spooning for the first time and let her push him into herself so she controls the tempo and how much goes in. Do not thrust into her...again, stay patient. It is about her. You mess this up, you will be lucky to get another shot. Once she starts moving back and forth, then you know she is ready for you to start moving as well. Keep the lube handy becuase she may need more half way through.
I hope you get your shot, but make it about her....get some flowers....draw her a bubble bath....get some wine coolers, massage her...you need to make her relaxed. If she is tense...it will not happen.

Good luck!!

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