i can't control my anger. i have tried tia chi, yoga with a lot of breathing excersizes, therapy when i was in school(my problem has been around for almost ten years now), the local mental health unit at the hospital, talking to people, acting out anger in a civilized way(beating pillows, hitting walls, shooting guns, yelling, boozing, drugs[not prescription, ie. dope, coke, speed, meth]) and sex(feels good, but still no long term effects) has no avail to my needs and wants. i have a family. my girlfriend and i have been dating for almost 4 years(we have been living together for almost 2 years) and we have a 14 month old daughter together. i love my girl and my kiddo very much, and i don't want my sweet Zoe Jane to see daddy in an assylum or go through a messy break-up with my dear Erin. i need help. badly! if anyone could help, i would really, REALLY appreciate any suggestions or comments or web sites or phone numbers. i feel like i have a short amount of time before my girlfriend won't be able to take any of my shit and leave me. please, i'm at my wits end and my last staw has ben taken and burned in front of me.

jeremy

Have you offerred her family therapy with individual counseling for yourself and perhaps (anti-anxiety) medication???

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The practice of putting women on pedestals began to die out when it was discovered that they could give orders better from there.~ Betty Grable

If I wanted your opinion, I'd remove the duct tape and ask you for it.~ Me
<~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~>
One man's dream is another man's nightmare~~~~> §¤ Lilith ¤§
~>My Scribbles<~
==>Gone Shopping<== ~Just a Quickie~ *~A Celebration Vacation~* ~Surprises~ Sleeping With the Window Open
What Did You Do Today? Self Defense Class ~Short Sweet Snippets~ § Summer Spin § Story Challenge Submission Pajamas

I must add the caveat:

I'm not a Dr. I just play one in my dungeon

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The practice of putting women on pedestals began to die out when it was discovered that they could give orders better from there.~ Betty Grable

If I wanted your opinion, I'd remove the duct tape and ask you for it.~ Me
<~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~>
One man's dream is another man's nightmare~~~~> §¤ Lilith ¤§
~>My Scribbles<~
==>Gone Shopping<== ~Just a Quickie~ *~A Celebration Vacation~* ~Surprises~ Sleeping With the Window Open
What Did You Do Today? Self Defense Class ~Short Sweet Snippets~ § Summer Spin § Story Challenge Submission Pajamas

My suggestion is to get into a anger management class or group therapy...in addition to one of those, I would suggest family therapy (with everyone, even the kids). If after some time in therapy, the therapist thinks you should go on meds and refers you to a psychiatrist, then so be it. But for someone with a drug history, I would be hesitant to go straight to psychotropic meds.

First you have to look at your behaviors and those patterns, and if any of those abusive or maladaptive coping mechanisms are still present. If you are still on any illegal drugs or alcohol, you won't be able to overcome nything.

The best idea is conjunctive therapy and support. This is not something that can be done on ur own, so make sure to make use of your resources. In my exerpience, the people who survive are the ones who recognize their resources and support system, then make use of it all.

If that means going away for a while to a rehab center or some sort of inpatient care, then so be it...sometimes getting to a neutral environment away from triggers can help. However, take the other options first.

Good luck.

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Caught in the Act
Anonymous
My Night Out, Part 1
My Night Out, Part 2

"The world is a mirror which is always in our vision"
- Me

well, about this time last year(which is coinsidently around my birthday), i was in the mental health unit at my hospital for alcoholism, depression and anxiety. they gave me some meds, but(stupid me) jumped off the meds and went to a die-hard yoga stage. that died quick with the lack of time to do my excersizes/stretches in the morning/afternoon/evening. i have found that i have a very addictvie personality, like my fondness of the drink, the tobacco, csi and other such things thatothers find strange. i think the things that i become so easily addicted to are fascinating, and as tome goes by the poeple around me become annoyed and irritated by my cozy structue of my life, and i feel that i have to change to regain that feeling i had before i was annoying. with all of my friends, i am the one they all talk to about their problems with life, girls/guys, work and other things, like i am their therapist. i also have this thing i call "the jesus christ syndrome", where i would do anything to help my friends out or even a total stranger, but in doing that, i end up disappointing the two dearest people in my life.

You can chase all the help you think you need, but the only person who can help you is you.

You need to learn to dis-engage when you feel the "flare" coming on.

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Calm, quiet, smooth, devastating

I'm curious if you've had these "don't want to lose those dear to me" revelation before. The reason I ask that is you state you've been through many interventions before but if you didn't truly have a desire to break the habits could have been part of their resulting lack of success. It sounds to me like you have a renewed motivation and sense of wanting to change - that could make all the difference in a therapy that lacked previously.

At any rate, kudos to you for realizing you've got an issue and want to resolve it for yourself and those you love dearly. Good Luck.

For me - a long walk whenever I feel myself "finding my anger". Knowing your hot buttons goes a long way to control. Talking to a professional is an excellent idea. You have to understands what gets you going and then knowing what options are available to you. Finding a constructive outlet is the only answer - options are needed my friend! Good luck

i have tried talking to professionals before, but the places i have gone just don't have answers i can relate to and the angry feelings just seem to overcome my logical reasoning. i have taken psyc in high school(three years ago) and i do remember touching base on anger(what causes and how it interacts with the brain and body). i do have an appointment with a place that people who are learning/working to be psycologists, so hopefully i can help someone with thier learning experience and they could help me out, since the jr. dr. is still in school learning about the things i am going through. i'll let ya'll know how the session goes.

thanks for all of your help and support. special thanks to lilith

jeremy

Hiya sorry i don't reply much, but if you're still having problems with anger managment etc, you can drop me a line any time email or msn iikiibuu@hotmail.com

And i'll do what i can to listen and chat. I may be able to pass on things i found useful and things i've had to adapt to keep on top of things. Something i've found for example is one thing will not work forever you have to keep at it. Because you can fight a demon one day, but the thing about them is you have to fight them the next day and then the next and so on and so forth they never really go away. You just need to learn to endure and be strong.

And i know it's hard. But the best way i'm finding out at the moment although at cost to myself some times is to control my anger before it gets angry if you know what i mean. To try and keep yourself from walking through the red mist stage. Although if you're like me it can put severe strain on your health, mind and body sometimes. I would always prefer this than the alternative. Anyway i know it all sounds doom and gloom and for that i do apologise. And rather than ramble on and lecture you i'll just say that if you want to hear what i have to say just give me an email and i'll see what i can do to help.

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