I know many here at Pixies have a slight sexual obsession. So I'm possing a hypothetical for you.

(I watch the show Cheaters alot on G4.)If you are in a relationship in which sex has stopped for a very lengthy period of time. Would you cheat on your S/O and how long do you think it would take for the most monogomous among us to actually do so? If you wouldn't then what would it actually take for you to cheat?

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Deep into that darkness peering,
long I stood there, wondering, fearing,
Doubting, dreaming dreams
no mortal ever dreamed before.

If sex has ceased for a long time I have a hard time seeing it as cheating.

Lots of variables to consider when trying to answer those questions so I guess it's easiest for me to contemplate if I just focus on the sex having gone out of the relationship aspect.

It really depends upon the individuals involved as to what the "limit" would be of going without sex. Then there's the question of whether the love is still there. Personally, I do believe that it's possible to be in love with more than one person at a time but there's a sort of filter in our hearts/minds that keeps many of us monogamous. Sometimes that filter is easier to let down than at others. So yes, I do believe that somewhere inside each of us we hold the capability of cheating on our partner.

For me it would have to be some sort of extraordinary circumstance for me to cheat, even if the sex was gone from the relationship. Not really sure what that circumstance would be but I do know I wouldn't be able to just decide, "Okay, I need to get laid. I'm going to cheat on her today." That's just not me. I can't answer how long a time it would take for me to get to the place where I decided I needed someone else. No idea at all.

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It takes a gutless mouse to play only when the cat's away.

No love, no friendship, can cross the path of our destiny without leaving some mark on it forever. ~~ Francois Mocuriac

Confucius say, "He who masturbate into cash register come into money."

An optimist looks at the glass and says it's half full. A pessimist looks at the glass and says it's half empty. A Cubs fan looks at the glass and says, "When's it gonna spill?"

Deus Impetitio Esuritori Nullus

If I was in a relationship where the sex had stopped for a lengthy period of time, I'd think I'd be asking myself some very serious questions. Sex is so important in a healthy relationship, and if it was to cease then that would be an indicator that the relationsip is in serious trouble. Rather than cheating on my SO, I'd try to see if we could work through the issues, and if that didn't work...I'd break it off with him. Then, I wouldn't have to cheat.

^^^^^Perfect - that's exactly what I was about to say.

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"Time flies like an arrow -
Fruit flies like a banana"

M Y - N A U G H T Y - P I C T U R E S ! !

Here's what Dan Savage, my favorite sex advice columnist has to say about it.

This, in a nutshell, has always been my tug-of-war...my tendency to have strong feelings of affection for more than one at once. I am not naturally monogamous. I have trained myself to be that way, essentially for the same reason Osuche explained...to do otherwise would be dissrespectful.

Truth : Untruth
I see a difference one to the other. Cheating is relative to Untruth as Faithful is relative to Truth.
I cheated. My dishonesty exposed my betrayal of our vows of faithfullness wrecking my marriage. Later, when all truth had finally been revealed and my treachery was fully known, I was no longer compelled to cheat. By then I could express my desire to have an affair with a man I knew.
My wife chafed, chagrined spoke out loud, "Do what you want to do." My man friend his wife and I, made love and enjoy each other's sexual energies.
My wife and I made love again and again throughout the times of my open extramarital bisexual affairs. But, my failure to control and seek sensual/sexual balance in my ravenous sexual appetite is the cause of my bringing destruction to my marriage. Had I known or been willing to get polyamory advice about honesty and openness, I might still be married and my sensuality/sexuality with other persons and couples outside my marriage would continue openly with full approval of my wife.
She loved me. But, I had already broken the faith, betrayed her trust in me. She stoodfast. Betrayed, she wanted me to choose. Her, or more sex. We eventually divorced.

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I like; a) taint brushing: b) a good cigar: c) our juices together; d) champagne: e) protein squirts; f)more of these; g)much more of these; h) Damn, slide that thing into me. Deep!
Adage: 2 things are certain in life; Death & Taxes. Therefore; God & Beelzebub had a meeting to fix the problem. A mighty storm prevailed for ages until finally they ended the storm with the agreement: From now on Anyone whom chooses doesn't have to die. "Everyone wins said Beelzebub. You get an eternally grateful bunch of worshippers praying forever for lower taxes as I goad & prod them forever with higher & higher taxation."

My marriage had deteriorated to the point of zero sex, zero intimacy, not even "hallway sex" (you know, passing each other in the hallway and saying 'fuck you'). After being married more than 20 years, after almost 5 years with no sex or intimacy, I began to cheat. Several years and several affairs later, I finally left the marriage. Why did I take so long? A combination of things, but mostly I don't think former-hubby cared about what I was doing, it was easier to stay than to leave, and I hadn't yet met anyone who inspired me to want to deal with divorce and the resulting fallout.

I'm not proud of myself for having done the things I did, but I do have a very different perspective as a result. I now have zero tolerance for cheating (within my own relationship), and, having formerly been a world-class liar, I won't buy any excuses or bullshit stories, as I've probably used them myself. Burn me once and we're done. Period.

Maybe I'm a hardass about it because I've been there and did it sooo well. Nope, I'm not proud of the things I used to do, but I have come clean with family and God and I'm not going to that place ever again. If my relationship ends up sexless as well as intimacy-less, and I can't live with it, I'll end the relationship before starting something new. I would owe that to him as well as to myself.

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Dear Lord, I pray for wisdom to understand my man, love to forgive him, and patience for his moods. Because Lord, if I pray for strength, I'll beat him to death. AMEN


It's no trick loving somebody at their best. Love is loving them at their worst.
~Tom Stoppard~


It isn't premarital sex if you have no intention of getting married.
~George Burns~


As bad as I am, I'm proud of the fact that I'm worse than I seem.
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