Ok friends, so my new boyfriends birthday is coming up soon, and .I thought for his birthday I would give him a lapdance. Problem is, I've never had one, never seen one, never even been to a strip club (I know, I know) and have basically NO CLUE wtf I am doing. Link me to some videos, pics, advice, suggestions, etc. please.

His birthday is Feb. 16th....I have about a month.

There is actually a series of strip tease lessons on youtube. As far as the dance moves are concerned anyway.

Strip tease/ lap dance

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"BOY: On a hot summer night, would you offer your throat to the wolf with the red roses? GIRL: Will he offer me his mouth? BOY: Yes. GIRL: Will he offer me his teeth? BOY: Yes. GIRL: Will he offer me his jaws? BOY: Yes. GIRL: Will he offer me his hunger? BOY: Yes. GIRL: Again, will he offer me his hunger? BOY: Yes! GIRL: Yes. BOY: On a hot summer night, would you offer your throat to the wolf with the red roses? GIRL: Yes. BOY: I bet you say that to all the boys!" -Meatloaf

Have you checked out Demi Moore's movie STRIP TEASE? She does it all in that movie, where she plays a stripper and an older Burt Reynolds(?) is one of her older clients.

A Lap dance is basically what they used to call "Dry Humping" but set to music. As a woman, you will sit on him, eventually, and grind your pelvis on his crotch... all while looking him in the eye, holding him or caressing him with your arms and hands...and eventually, you bring him to a climax (= a HAPPY ENDING, that's what it's called) or your own climax - or you can do the usual, and just get up when the music ends, and leave him to beg for more of your ATTENTION

At that point, in a strip club, the client pays for another dance ... or for OFF-the-Book services. But usually, it's just more lap dances... for about $20 a "dance" until he's satisfied or he's out of money.

And of course, it pays to be wearing SOME clothing, but as revealing as possible... so it gets him in the right "mood".

Good luck and many Happy Endings, for Both of you