Hey all, new author here! I recently submitted my fantasy story, Rising, into the (of course) fantasy section. It starts out pretty slow and it takes awhile for the sex to start, but I'd like to think it's a relatively decent work of fiction.

If anyone has any kind of question/comment/critique, I'd be more than happy to hear them here, or at Crouching_Buddha2000@yahoo.com

I hope you all enjoy, chapter 2 is on the way soon!

C.B.

Just read the story and really enjoyed it CB! You have a good way of painting pictures with words to help the reader visualize what's happening. Look forward to Chapter 2.

Dicksbro,

Woo-hoo! Huzzah, my first feedback! Thanks for the kind words, aaand...since you were nice, I'll go ahead and post up ch.2

Follow this great and wise man's trend, people

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Most things worth saying, shouldn't be.

"Batman was a SCIENTIST?!" -Homer Simpson

hmmm...2000+ reads and only one message of feedback...slight discrepancy, eh? ^^;

Maybe I need to start bribing folk.

Leave me comments and I shall stop making a mass annoyance of myself!

Leave me comments and I won't post up nuddie picks of myself, thus sparring your eyes and precious brain cells!

Seriously. Anyone enjoying? Not enjoying? Feed the feedback whore!

__________________
Most things worth saying, shouldn't be.

"Batman was a SCIENTIST?!" -Homer Simpson

Most of the people who read the stories are not necessarily a part of the forums. Many are just passersby on the web.

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The practice of putting women on pedestals began to die out when it was discovered that they could give orders better from there.~ Betty Grable

If I wanted your opinion, I'd remove the duct tape and ask you for it.~ Me
<~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~>
One man's dream is another man's nightmare~~~~> §¤ Lilith ¤§
~>My Scribbles<~
==>Gone Shopping<== ~Just a Quickie~ *~A Celebration Vacation~* ~Surprises~ Sleeping With the Window Open
What Did You Do Today? Self Defense Class ~Short Sweet Snippets~ § Summer Spin § Story Challenge Submission Pajamas

I suppose I hadn't really thought about that...

well. Now I just look like an ass.

__________________
Most things worth saying, shouldn't be.

"Batman was a SCIENTIST?!" -Homer Simpson

Nah... You look like someone who wonders if people like what you write. I felt the same way when I used to write.

__________________

The practice of putting women on pedestals began to die out when it was discovered that they could give orders better from there.~ Betty Grable

If I wanted your opinion, I'd remove the duct tape and ask you for it.~ Me
<~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~>
One man's dream is another man's nightmare~~~~> §¤ Lilith ¤§
~>My Scribbles<~
==>Gone Shopping<== ~Just a Quickie~ *~A Celebration Vacation~* ~Surprises~ Sleeping With the Window Open
What Did You Do Today? Self Defense Class ~Short Sweet Snippets~ § Summer Spin § Story Challenge Submission Pajamas

I read your story and I liked it so much that became part of the forums just to tell you so. Was just looking for a quick read to make me horny, but your story... well i started to read it, got engrossed but didnt have time to finish it that night. So all through the next day I was thinking about it, wondering where it was leading. Got home and read the rest... Mmmmmm... so much bettter than a "quick-fix". When I read that you'd actually cut the sex scene down I scrolled up to see how long it had actually been. It certainly didn't drag out, I didn't even notice it was as long as that. And everything was so much better for the build up. So much better. Maybe that's just me though.

So yeh, loved it... Do you need me to revert to my usual ego-deflating self in order to get your head through the doorway? :P

Wow, thanks for the awesome feedback! I'm very glad you enjoyed. I'm also very glad to hear that you found the story was better for the long delay for the sex. I've often questioned myself as to whether I should have kept it off for so long, but it's feedback like this that makes me feel I made the right decision for this story

And no, no need to deflate my ego! I'll grin (and possibly strut, if I'm feeling particularly happy-go-lucky) at positive feedback, but I've gotten enough hate mail to keep me humble. Well, maybe humble is a stretch. It keeps my head just small enough so I can fit through the door

By the way, chapter 10 is going up in about 2 minutes, for you and anyone else reading this thread who may care

__________________
Most things worth saying, shouldn't be.

"Batman was a SCIENTIST?!" -Homer Simpson

Yup loved the new chapter. I really liked the whole thieves guild part, but i am usually attracted to that kind of thing in fantasy books. Not sure if is just me though or whether perhaps the second sex scene is kinda... jumped into. It's like, well thats the conversation part over, here's the sex. Maybe a little bit of overlap would do it.

Actually, I've just reread it and I disagree with myself so never mind...

Cant wait for the next chapter though...

[QUOTE=ReaperWoman]
Actually, I've just reread it and I disagree with myself so never mind...
QUOTE]

lol, are you sure? You can tell me if it is, I won't, you know, be a

I'm glad you're enjoying. It may be a bit of a wait till the next part...I'm having some difficulties with writing at the moment...but more fiction will roll around shortly, so stay tuned!

Or you could feedback more. I won't complain...but only this once!

__________________
Most things worth saying, shouldn't be.

"Batman was a SCIENTIST?!" -Homer Simpson

Well when i read it the first time i was very aware that the conversation kinda stopped and the rest began. But when I went back and re-read it, I didnt seem to notice it so much. So I don't know whether I was maybe skim-reading a little, which made it jump...

*sighs* I guess I'll just HAVE to go back and read it again...


And get writing boy! Or it'll be me doing the complaining...

Lol, sorry for my long absence. I've been swamped with a looot of random stuff. I know I know, no excuses!

I haven't gotten to posting up a new chapter of Rising yet, but that should be around fairly soon. I DID just put up a new chapter of X-men: Bast. I dunno if you're reading that at all Reaper, but if so, it's there. And if not, Rising is up after one more chapter of Bast, promise

Now to go crawl under my desk to hide from the tornado outside.

__________________
Most things worth saying, shouldn't be.

"Batman was a SCIENTIST?!" -Homer Simpson

Love it, love it. Though I hope you'll excuse me that I kinda skimmed over the map section. Nothing personal, I frequently skip passages when I'm not in the mood for description. Laziness I guess...


Thought that the progression into the sex was a lot more fluid this time too. Though I'm still not sure whether that was to do with my skim-reading in the first place!

Look forward to seeing more writing! (Soon! )

Glad you enjoyed! I didn't expect everyone to really dig the whole 'map' thing, but I have gotten a lot of email requesting such a scene so they can get more familiar and oriented toward the world. So I figured that would help.

I actually thought the sex-scene was somewhat roughly transitioned into to be honest...we have them kissing, getting emotional, then talking and calming down, then getting physical again, and then BAM, sex. That's how it felt to me at least, and I almost was going to do a re-write and try to make it smoother, but my fiance said it was good as is.

But hey, if my readers say it was good, then it's good!

Another chapter is in the works...this one may be a few weeks, not sure. Some of it's pre-written already, and some of it is going to have to be completely worked up from scratch. We'll see how it pans out

__________________
Most things worth saying, shouldn't be.

"Batman was a SCIENTIST?!" -Homer Simpson