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  #1  
Old 08-21-2001, 09:14 AM
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m45 m45 is offline
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Location: The Great SW
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Smile Its Great to be a guy because:

Now for some important words. Its Great to be a guy because:

1. Your ass is never a factor in a job interview.
2. Your orgasms are real. Always.
3. Your last name stays put.
4. The garage is all yours.
5. Wedding plans take care of themselves.
6. You never feel compelled to stop a friend from getting laid.
7. Car mechanics tell you the truth.
8. You don't give a rat's ass if someone notices your new haircut.
9. Hot wax never comes near your pubic area.
10. Same work ... more pay.
11. Wrinkles add character.
12. You don't have to leave the room to make emergency crotch adjustments.
13. Wedding Dress $2000; Tux rental $100.
14. If you retain water, it's in a canteen.
15. People never glance at your chest when you're talking to them.
16. New shoes don't cut, blister, or mangle your feet.
17. Porn movies are designed with you in mind.
18. Your pals can be trusted never to ask you, "So, notice anything different?"
19. One mood, ALL the damn time.
20. Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds.
21. A five-day vacation requires only one suitcase.
22. You can open all your own jars.
23. Dry cleaners and hair cutters don't rob you blind.
24. You can go to a public toilet without a support group.
25. You can leave the motel bed unmade.
26. You get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness.
27. If someone forgets to invite you to something, you can still be friends.
28. Your underwear is $10 for a threepack.
29. If you are 34 and single, nobody notices.
30. Everything on your face stays its original color.
31. You can quietly enjoy a car ride from the passenger's seat.
32. Three pairs of shoes are more than enough.
33. You don't have to clean your apartment if the meter reader is coming.
34. You can quietly watch a game with your buddy for hours without ever thinking "He must be mad at me. "
35. No maxipads.
36. You don't mooch off other's desserts.
37. You can drop by to see a friend without having to bring a little gift.
38. If another guy shows up at the party in the same outfit, you just might become lifelong friends.
39. You are not expected to know the names of more than five colors.
40. You don't have to stop and think of which way to turn a nut on a bolt.
41. You almost never have strap problems in public.
42. You are unable to see wrinkles in your clothes.
43. The same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe decades.
44. You don't have to shave below your neck.
45. Your belly usually hides your big hips.
46. One wallet and one pair of shoes, one color, all seasons.
47. You can "do" your nails with a pocket knife.
48. You have freedom of choice concerning growing a mustache.
49. Christmas shopping can be accomplished for 25 relatives, on December 24th, in 45 minutes.
50. The world is your urinal.

Hope you all liked that one..

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  #2  
Old 08-21-2001, 10:48 AM
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amyandcody amyandcody is offline
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*cracking up*

lol brilliant! *still laughing*
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  #3  
Old 08-21-2001, 10:59 AM
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m45 m45 is offline
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Smile

Got that in the eMail this AM, Had to post it. Had us on the floor....

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  #4  
Old 08-21-2001, 11:34 AM
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Fang Fang is offline
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HAHAHAHAHAHAH...AAAHHHH---HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

Oh, holy shit M, that was funny! I needed a good laugh today, thanks!
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  #5  
Old 08-21-2001, 01:49 PM
nobbit nobbit is offline
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most excellent mate. couldnt agree with you more..
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  #6  
Old 08-21-2001, 02:04 PM
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Petunia Petunia is offline
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Pretty funny..

... but, no. 1 may not be exactly true. Especially if I were doing the hiring! LOL
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  #7  
Old 08-21-2001, 05:50 PM
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SensualLove SensualLove is offline
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~~I am busting a gutt here... To f***ing comical!!! But so true!!!!
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  #8  
Old 08-21-2001, 07:46 PM
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classydj classydj is offline
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Location: calgary alberta canada
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Cool It's Funny....

CAUSE IT'S TRUE.

ClassyDJ
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  #9  
Old 03-11-2006, 08:23 PM
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Scarecrow Scarecrow is offline
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bump
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  #10  
Old 03-11-2006, 11:38 PM
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Cjack Cjack is offline
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Great words of wisdom.
Most are true except for a few as you get older.
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  #11  
Old 03-12-2006, 06:10 PM
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Mark Vieth Mark Vieth is offline
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So so true

So true that it's funny.
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  #12  
Old 03-12-2006, 07:33 PM
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krempy05 krempy05 is offline
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My personal favorite was the last one, very true especially for a college kid...
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  #13  
Old 03-12-2006, 08:54 PM
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Oldfart Oldfart is offline
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Still as true today.
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  #14  
Old 03-12-2006, 10:21 PM
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krempy05 krempy05 is offline
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Good to hear.
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