400

Diva, where's my picture?

Don't remember posting this one.

So this is where they come from!!!!!
 

I was told this pic reminds BigBob of me?????!!!!! LOL ;) :D


BigBob...she is much sexier than I am!!!!! Heeheehee!!!!

I know, Halloween's over for most everybody, but there's a full moon out tonight...

If everyone had wedding vows like these....the world would be rocking!!!! :D :D :)

Hey Oldfart.....is this what it is like down under????? :D :D ;)

Yep.....my sentiments....EXACTLY..... :D :D...and the good thing about it....it don't talk back!!! :D :D

Hop along
 

Not my style, but perhaps worth trying.

LOL Oldfart!


Here is another one...... :D

NURSERY RHYMES THAT NEVER MADE IT
 

JACK AND JILL Went up the hill
To have a little fun.
Stupid Jill Forgot the pill
And now they have a son.

MARY HAD A LITTLE LAMB
her father shot it dead
Now it goes to school with her
Between two hunks of bread.

LITTLE MISS MUFFET sat on a tuffet,
Her clothes all tattered and torn.
It had not been the spider
that crept up beside her
But Little Boy Blue and his horn.

THERE WAS A LITTLE GIRL,
who had a little curl!
Right in the middle of her forehead...
And when she was good,
she was very, very good
But when she was bad she got a fur coat,
jewels, a sports car......

HUMPTY DUMPTY sat on a wall
humpty dumpty had a great fall
all the kings horses and all the kings men
had scrambled eggs for breakfast again.

HEY DIDDLE, DIDDLE,
the cat did a piddle
all over the bedside clock,
The little dog laughed to see such fun
when it died of electric shock.

GEORGIE PORGY Pudding and Pie
Kissed the girls and made them cry.
When the boys came out to play
He kissed them too 'cause he was gay.

Re: NURSERY RHYMES THAT NEVER MADE IT
 

Hickory dickory dock
Two mice ran up the clock.
The clock struck one,
The other got away.
Hickory dickory dock.

new horizons?
 

bi curious?

OMG FINN!!!!!!

Never in a million years would I have thought of using a Barbie doll!!!! (Hammer was bad enough :D ;))

But if I would...it would be a KEN or a GI JOE doll!!!!!!! :D :)

TFF!!!!!! :D

Diva,
Sounds like a new thread...Watch out Ken, here cums LoveDiva4U!!!

LMAO Biggun!!!! One never knows what I will do next...heeheehee :D :D :)

:p

great thread
 

another.

stereotype?
 

well... i´we heard they are big but...???

If this has been posted before i'm sorry

Of course this would NEVER happen here @ Pixies.. would it ppl

At Lasr They use the right language
 

Microsft finally got the message that we ozzies needed an operating system written in a way for us to express ourselves correctly

ummm, not to offen anyone

The Geography of a woman:

Between the ages of 15 - 18 a woman is like China or Iran.
Developing at a sizzling rate with a lot of potential but as yet still
not free or open.

Between the ages of 18 - 21 a woman is like Africa or Australia.
She is half discovered, half wild and naturally beautiful with bushland around the fertile deltas.

Between the ages of 21 - 30 a woman is like America or Japan.
Completely discovered, very well developed and open to trade especially with countries with cash or cars.

Between the ages of 30 - 35, she is like India or Spain.
Very hot, relaxed and convinced of its own beauty.

Between the ages of 35 - 40 a woman is like France or Argentina.
She may have been half destroyed during the war but can still be a warm and desirable place to visit.

Between the ages of 40 - 50 she is like Yugoslavia or Iraq.
She lost the war and is haunted by past mistakes. Massive
reconstructions now necessary.

Between the ages of 50 - 60 she is like Russia or Canada.
Very wide, quiet and the borders are practically unpatrolled but the frigid climate keeps people away.

Between the ages of 60 - 70 a woman is like England or Mongolia.
With a glorious and all conquering past but alas no future.

After 70, they become Albania or Pakistan
Everyone knows where it is, but no one wants to go there

its B1 and B2 :D

TDK

The ABC (Afghan Broadcasting Corporation) has a

lot to answer for.

Perhaps Thomas the Tank Engine has a different

meaning too.

"Thomas , powering a T72 with the new high velocity

cannon, went to see the Fatwa Controller."

:) hehehe, i have really enjoyed all these jokes and pics. thanks evahh so much for them everyone. a wonderful way to kick off a saturday morning. coffee and chuckles. i have one i'd like to add. hope ya'll enjoy it. who knew this about the flintstones? *giggle*

Must have been Avon calling........lol ;)

Just received.

Oh, Oldfart.... turn the heat up, it just got cold in here!

Look out, rabies can strike at any time...

Scotzoidman

The answer is yes, but only 4 days a month.

Anyway, you know how hard it is to get funny smut these days.

RE:Must have been avon calling....
 

Sure hope it wasn't this Avon Lady!!! :eek: :D

Rock Hard
 

How is this for rock hard??
Hope this was not posted earlier..

Avon.
 

Diva.

Don't buy the face powder!!

Sometimes I wish I had this problem...

Head and Shoulders
 

A blonde and a brunette are both in an elevator. On the third floor a man gets on who's perfect: Italian suit, handsome, great build with a nice butt, but unfortunately they both notice he has a bad case of dandruff. The man gets off on the 5th floor. Once the doors close, the brunette turns to the blonde and says, "Someone should give him Head&Shoulders, To which the blonde replies, "How do you give Shoulders ?"

LoveDiva4u---Having two blonde daughters;I don't think;that
there is a Blonde joke that I haven't heard.Many times;I will
e-mail; them to them.I see them;quite often;but I am still very
close to them.They both have two children now;and don't live
home anymore. Irish

Some really like to start having sex at a very early age!!!! :D :D

that's bad!!
 

Diva, thats bad lmao:D
were do you come up with these?:D :D

Is it too early for Thanksgiving jokes? Nah!

Thanksgiving's So Dirty!

Here are some quotes heard at Thanksgiving that are perfectly clean, except to you dirty minded folks out there!

"Whew, that's one terrific spread!"
"I'm in the mood for a little dark meat."
"Tying the legs together keeps the inside moist."
"Talk about a huge breast!"
"It's Cool Whip time!"
"If I don't undo my pants, I'll burst!"
"Are you ready for seconds yet?"
"Are you going to come again next time?"
"It's a little dry, do you still want to eat it?"
"Just wait your turn, you'll get some!"
"Don't play with your meat."
"Just spread the legs open & stuff it in."
"Do you think you'll be able to handle all these people at once?"
"I didn't expect everyone to come at once!"
"You still have a little bit on your chin."
"Use a nice smooth stroke when you whip it."
"How long will it take after you stick it in?"
"You'll know it's ready when it pops up."
"Wow, I didn't think I could handle all of that!"
"How many are coming?"
"That's the biggest one I've ever seen!"
"Just lay back & take it easy...I'll do the rest."
"How long do I beat it before it's ready?"

Another:

A trip to the emergency room has never been so comical!!! :D :D