All I have to say is that its not premarital sex if you don't plan on getting married.

Can I answer this question ...... :) ... I've bought a couple of cars without ever test driving them .... and it turned out very well for me.

In answer to the sex before marriage thing ... like Lil said, people make choices for a variety of reasons, I condemn neither view point, nor the presentation of why someone makes that choice ... we do what we believe we will be comfortable with for the most part in this life, that's how I make my decisions ... not worrying about whether or not someone who might hear my reasons for a decision finds them a worthy argument.

let's say you marry at the age 30. and you are still virgin until 30??? I think you are missing sooooooooooo much in your life during your young age. Young age is the best time to explore thing and plus for example a woman's body can react to sex and adapt to sex more much faster at a younger age more enjoyful , and her body can grow fuller at a younger age, isn't that look prettier and sexier?

for example you are marrying at the age of 30, your body is too old to grow fuller or change or even take slower to adapt to the sex than when you are younger. This is from my opinion.

i think when you are younger, you are much easier to enjoy anything and get use to anything.

this is not pointing to those mature women, this only to those women who virgin until 30.

Life is toooooo dam Short! enjoy as much as you can before you grow old or die.

Lil and Fzzy,

I agree totally with you both on this point, and have therefore never before questioned people's decision to abstain from sex before marriage.

However, watching these two particular young women on TV made me worry for them. They really seemed to have reached their decision for the wrong reasons. They were so focussed on trying to ensure that the man they slept with was not going to up and leave them in the morning, that I felt as though their fears about that might actually cloud their judgement in a relationship.

I also worried that they would be totally unprepared for the complications and implications that a sexual relationship bring and those complications may even jeopardise their relationships with their future husbands.

I suppose my reason for starting this thread is to reassure myself that there are people out there who make this decision, not from fear but from a more positive and healthy perspective.

Some of my friends waited a looooong time before losing their virginity and I respect them for that but I was a gigantic hormone and couldn't wait.

Leave it to WI to have the most complex car analogy ever!

Only because I didn't wanna be graphic!

I'm beginning to see why PF gives you such a hard time! Your meatless ways make you cranky!

I will be the odd one out, I am planing on staying a virgin until i get married, but those plans may change with the right guy. it's not an emotional thing, it's not a moral thing, i just would personaly feel guilty about having to tell my husband i'm sorry you weren't the first. it's not that i think having it before hand is bad, everyone has their own view. i've seen what happens and i don't want any of that. i suppose i would find it tempting if i ever had a date, but when i was with my boyfriend from awhile it wasn't a problem, i was like look i'm not doing anything till i'm ready it might be with you it might not, if you don't like it get out, he did and i find it's a lot better without him. and that will end my rambling for the day

Good for you dreamgurl... I'm one of those women as well... Yes, 29, and staring 30 in the face, I'm still a virgin. I have hormones and they rage, but I take care of them on my own rather than have "meaningless" sex. For me sex is more than an act - it's acting upon emotion, and I want to be sure that I have the emotions for that person. I know the value in sex for the pure pleasure of sex - pure, raw, unemotional sex... but I still want to have that with the person I love... not someone I met at a club.

I can't say I will be a virgin when I marry (if I marry) - but until the right guy comes along :)

What's wrong with wanting your car with as few miles as possible and fresh off of the NEW side of the lot??!

Nobody wants a used klunker and NOTHING beats that new car feeling that comes fully equipped with warranty backed dependability.

I'd take a brand new Lexus over an old ragged klunker anyday.


But, personally, I don't think it matters rather or not the person you are involved with has had sex or not... But as for me and mine, I will have the honor and priveledge of telling my husband, "Baby, I saved myself for you and you only...Now, Take me!"

i need a test drive before i buy

i sure as hell want to have sex before marriage

Re: Sex before marriage?
 

My take on it: Anyone who remains a virgin until their wedding night in our society has some fairly serious problems about sex. I would not want to marry such a person.

The path to an emotionally compatible sexual relationship - rather than "meaningless sex" is a different one for me to the path to the altar.

I would find it very odd to have developed the emotional relationship in which sex would then be the wholly natural action only to be told that this was off the menu until the wedding night.

It' love and marriage - not sex and marriage. I always felt that female virginity was the vestige of a patriarchal system for the benefit of men not women.

About my 3 cents.

so do you mean virgin won't masturate at all? or are you telling me you can masturbate but you won't have sex with a man ??? hehehheheh :D

Please remember that there is a happy median between being a 'slut' and being a 'saint'.

I've never been married and am not a virgin, but likewise I've never engaged in casual sex.

I don't believe that you only love once, because I personally have been in love on more than one occasion.

I can honestly say that all of my sexual experiences have been with people I've loved very deeply and I have never regretted sleeping with any man.

However, I would have deeply regretted marrying the first man I loved enough to sleep with.