damn wishy-washy lesbian
 

my girlfriend, goddess knows I love her dearly but she changes as the wind blows. Last night she said maybe she should go straight that this whole lesbian thing isn't what she wants, I support her and roll over to sleep, then she attacks my neck and shoulders (my weak spots) and nibbles and kisses me. trying to be supportive I remind her that she wants to be straight and that I don't have a penis. so we go to sleep. this morning I wake up and she has turned the AC to high and taken all the covers off my side of the bed so I of course, snuggle. every thing went normal until later when I was toying with a nipple through her shirt and balked when she went to play with mine..... It does nothing for me and she knows it. my nipples have been "ravaged" enought that they just don't feel. and so I see it as wasted effort on her part. she got pissed off because I moved. I told her that I "don't enjoy it" and she got pissed off and won't let me touch her at all.... ok now how should I have handled this situation?

Confused Kyttn

Be straight forward about the situation. Confront her in a non-threatning way about the situation.

*Clint

tried.... and failed as usual

Damn hun. I dunno what to do. Ya'll come up to Birmingham and we can go out for lunch and talk this over ;)

*Clint

PM me if you need anything :D

Clint nah you dont need to see two fat lesbians

He wouldn't be seeing two fat women. Remember Bama, I've met both of ya. Clint, don't let them lie, they're two beautiful ladies. And Bama, just point out that if she's going to go straight, then go straight. If she's not, then she needs to touch you in the right spots, not somewhere that you don't like.

*LOL* You're very lucky then Capoc. I really hope that every thing works out for the best Bama. Keep us posted, and you know we are all here for you if you need anything. :D

*Clint

*smile* thanks 'Poc, haven't seen you in much was wondering if you didn't like my favourite spot ;)

Clint yeah he drove from really far away to meet us....

Hi. I'm a newbie as you can see. If I'm allowed to ask a question on this, is it possible that the g/f may be experiencing a moment where she realized that men aren't the disgusting creatures she thought they were? Since I'm not a female I can only understand as much about women as I possible could. So it fascinates me to read(wherever possible) about what drives a woman to go to a guy or another woman. Perhaps she formed her original opinions on men based on her past experiences with them. Then she went to you as a means of comfort and support and thought she could get rid of them altogether. But she's realizing that it's too difficult for her to do that and that's why she's uncommital(sp?).

Am I close in my assessment of her?

I tend to agree with Capoc Kyttn. I know she is a few years older than you. Thes are complex issuesand it is difficult to comment not knowing the personality of your friend. Obviously emotions, biological clocks, self doubt and self scrutiny are all involved here. She has to decide her path and you have to be yourself, you can't change for anyone, you are you and your reactions should be true. You don't have to be callous about things but be sensetive, caring and supportive.

Take care Kyttn, I have a lot of respect and fondness for you.

Kyttn

When we get a tad dissatisfied with life, we look around

to see what we can change to make it better. We make a dozen false

changes, realise we're being silly, and try to integrate the changes

into our lives.

Preference for gender is at a different level to partner preference.

Perhaps you need to talk about that instead of the gender smokescreen.

Big cuddle and hope it works out.

Bamakyttn---When you don't know about the subject-my advice-
don't comment;as it could be the wrong advice,Therefore;No
Comment.Just treat it as you would ANY relationship!If you need
any support;just ask. Irish

well, she is 10 years older and over the last 5 years she and I got closer and closer..... even she will admit that her taste in me is detrimental, most every man she has dated has done her wrong..... thats their fault. but she still talks to them and even now they do her wrong, talk bad about her, about me, she still cares and I think she needs to learn to isolate herself from the negative people. my specialty. she is a very open, careing, and emotional woman very passionate about what she does thinks and says. I on the other hand have been compared to the berg that sank the Titanic and found that I made it a tropical island on the equator. I tend to keep to myself, I dont show emotions, I only show anger(damn irish temper) and she wants me to all of a sudden blossom into a weep-n-wet betty doll. I think that her next step will be veggies rather than men, or maybe farm animals..... but she is very adamant that men aren't where she wants to be.

Kyttn

Hi BamaKyttn. I've been with my g/f for almost 4 years now, and we've definitely been through our rough times, too. It sounds like you are really confused about what's going on in your g/f's head right now. If I were you, I would try and have an open discussion about what's going on here outside the bedroom. I know at least for me, it's really hard to talk about things that have to do with sex, the relationship, etc. when I'm lying in bed, either half asleep or with other things on my mind. Have you asked what prompted her to make the "going straight" comment in the first place? What's on her mind? Is it that she wants to try new things sexually? (Like, does she want to use a strap on?) If she does want to try different things, you need to ask yourself if you are wiling to. It sounds like she might be frustrated with you pulling away after the breast play, which isn't anyone's fault. I know emotions can run high during this sort of thing, but you two really should talk about. I know if my g/f told me not to play with her breasts, I would be really depressed about it, so maybe you two need to sit down and have an honest discussion about what's going on in your relationship. If you can't do that, is the relationship really worth saving?

P.S. Feel free to PM if you have any personal questions you want to ask. And good luck with everything. I know it can hurt.

UnsilenceMe

"I can complain because the rosebush has thorns, or rejoice that the thornbush has a rose. It is all up to me."