No Makin Bacon Nakid!!!
 

:D :D

Way before days with Kiddies at home, we set this rule no matter how horney we may be....anyone else with good home sex remedies or rules to share??

Never lick the inside of a freezer that you have to defrost!
(It rips the skin off your tongue and then you can't suck him for a week!)

Don't stand on a wet floor and kiss him while he is playing with his power tools!
(The shock....albeit initially exciting....can fry the part of your brain that tells you that you are horny and then there goes your sex life!)

Don't whip the potatoes while your cock is erect!
(Those beaters can really mangle the tip!)

And on the same note......Don't whip the potatoes without donning a bra!
(Those beaters suck your breasts in and, again, they can really mangle you!)

No missionary fucking on a 100 year old pine plank floor!
(It was constructed with "cut nails" and they pop up at the worst times.....and the pine IS OLD and splinters are hard to get out of your own ass!)


These are just a few of "OUR" rules skip! Most were discovered quite by accident..........but they are hard and fast rules now! LMAO!

If you were fixing a lunch with company in mind, watch where you aim the cum.

Be sure the picture window curtains are pulled (if you have a city lot and close by neighbors).

Painting is rather fun in the nude.

Don't stir hot coffee with your cock.

A frozen spoon will stick to wet nipples:o:p


Don't pull on a frozen spoon stuck to a wet nipple:D

As I was looking over these rules one thing came to mind:





O U C H ! ! !


:eek: