Universal Laws
 

Law of Mechanical Repair:

After your hands become coated with grease, your nose will begin to itch or you'll have to pee.

Law of the Workshop:

Any tool, when dropped, will roll to the least accessible corner.

Law of Probability:

The probability of being watched is directly proportional to the stupidity of your act.

Law of the Telephone:

If you dial a wrong number, you never get a busy signal.

Law of the Alibi:

If you tell the boss you were late for work because you had a flat tire, the very next morning you will have a flat tire.

Variation Law:

If you change lines (or traffic lanes), the one you were in will start to move faster than the one you are in now, or, the register will close when you get there. :( (works every time).

Law of the Bath:

When the body is fully immersed in water, the telephone rings, or, if you try to outsmart it by unplugging the phone ... the doorbell rings :rolleyes2 .

Law of Close Encounters:

The probability of meeting someone you know increases when you are with someone you don't want to be seen with.

Law of the Result:

When you try to show someone that a machine won't work, it will.

Law of Biomechanics:

The severity of the itch is inversely proportional to the reach.

Law of the Theatre:

At any event, the people whose seats are furthest from the aisle, arrive last.

Murphy's Law of Lockers:

If there are only two people in a locker room, they will have adjacent lockers.

Law of Location:

No matter where you go, there you are. (this one's too deep for me!)

Brown's Law:

If the shoe fits, it's ugly.

Wilson's Law:

As soon as you find a product that you really like, they will stop making it

Brown's Law:

If the shoe fits, it's ugly.


Was that written by Buster Brown? :rofl:

And the other guy has a huge penis. :banghead:

Law of the Workshop:

Any tool, when dropped, will roll to the least accessible corner.

I've seen Mr. Lixy throw a tool on the floor and when asked about it said, "It was gonna fall there anyway...that's the kind of day I'm having!"

Law of the Alibi:

If you tell the boss you were late for work because you had a flat tire, the very next morning you will have a flat tire.

It's true peeps...karma I tell ya!

Variation Law:

If you change lines (or traffic lanes), the one you were in will start to move faster than the one you are in now, or, the register will close when you get there. :( (works every time).

I learned this by being a "backseat driver". I always feel bad when I insist Mr. Lixy change lanes and then we slow to a snail's pace while our prior lane rolls on.

Law of the Result:

When you try to show someone that a machine won't work, it will.

Happens with my sewing machine and boss all the time!

Law of Location:

No matter where you go, there you are. (this one's too deep for me!)

Now...someone stole this from me. I say it all the time!

Wilson's Law:

As soon as you find a product that you really like, they will stop making it

Yeah...that elusive black bean dip I love so much. *sigh*

No; by Tagg. :rofl:

(We are probably two of the few that get this, SC. lol ;) )

dicksbro,

Good chuckles. :) Thank you.

Then there's the Law of Electronics:

A $1000 computer component will protect a $6 surge protector by blowing first.

Law of the bathroom:

The length of time the bathroom is occupied is directly proportional to how badly you need to use it.

Sometimes known as Mrs Murphy's Law: the chance of the bread falling buttered-side down is directionally proportional to the cost of the carpet.

I'm saddened to say I am another of the few. *bark, bark*