Am I the only one?
 

I have this sexual "flaw" that I have found to be increasingly frustrating. I am posting this thread in hopes that 1) I am not the only one who experiences this & 2) that some of you may be willing to offer me suggestions on how to stop!

Note: Even tho I have been celebate for a very long time, I recall this also being the case when I was intimate with every partner in my past.

Okay- here is the flaw- I shut off my orgasm prematurely. Sound wierd? Let me explain. It doesn't take me very long to feel my orgasm building and I do enjoy that very much. However, once it reaches its peak I immediately shut it off. I don't allow myself to experience all of it. Instead of feeling satisfied, I am frustrated. My body tells me there is more but it also won't allow me to experience it in its entirety.

I don't know why this has proven to be the norm for me. I don't know if it is a bi-product of low self esteem, or perhaps the fact that I am more of a giver than a taker. Or maybe my body just can't handle the intensity?

So I am curious, am I the only one that experiences this? Any tips on how to deal with it?

Kisses.

Sorry I can't be of any help...the only time I ever tried to shut off an orgasm was when she said, "I think the rubber broke!"

I wasn't entirely successful either...

Delving back into the depths of my past to when I was actually having sex, (which was a long time ago, unfortunately - we could probably compare notes), I seem to remember something similar to this. It didn't happen every time, as I usually found I orgasmed quite easily and several times over, but sometimes it felt like I couldn't quite get there, or couldn't quite finish the ride, so to speak. Very frustrating, as you say. (...and this is even more frustrating, writing about my sex life in the past tense! I need to remedy that.)

Does this happen when you're alone, when you bring yourself to orgasm or do you shut off then also? I used to shut off when masturbating and didn't allow myself to quite 'get there', but with lots(!) of practice I can let myself go more now and I've been discovering whole new sensations. I think the lack of sex with a guy has made me get more familiar with my own body, more confident to know what I want and how to achieve it, and to relax in the knowledge that I WILL get there, and when I get there, to go with it, don't stop or get distracted when reaching that shut-off point.

I'm not sure any of this helps much, but I think I know what you mean :nod: