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axe31 04-03-2002 06:06 PM

the best man
 
i have been asked to be the best man at a freinds
weding the only problem is the soon to be husband
is an ex and has left left it up to me if we should tell
her she knows i date guys but not that her guy is
one of them so what should i do

Lilith 04-03-2002 06:15 PM

I do not think it is your place to tell her. Either their marriage is gonna be based on open honesty or not, but it is THEIR marriage. I say "Don't ask~ Don't tell" :D I would stay the hell out of it as much as possible. YIKES!!!

Sugarsprinkles 04-03-2002 06:23 PM

I'm with Lilith on this. If she's going to find out, it should be from HIM! Stay as far out of it as you can! Do your thing as Best Man and keep your mouth shut about the past!!

Aqua 04-03-2002 06:38 PM

I think he has a right to be open about his past partners IF he wants to, but this is his decision... he's the one marrying this woman. He should not ask you to make this decision.

MissX 04-03-2002 07:04 PM

I'm with the others, it is totally unfair that the pressure is put on you when it should come from him.
Just do what you've been asked as Best Man, if he feels he should tell more he should do it before the wedding.
Hugs
MissX

MrX 04-04-2002 02:09 AM

Yes, Not your responsibility to tell her. HE's the one marrying her.
Let Sleeping dogs lie i say...

danziggy 04-04-2002 02:33 AM

i agree with all the others. its his choice to tell. if you tell it could prob blow up in your face and then you may lose your friend. i say let it lie.

souls_cry2000 04-04-2002 02:44 AM

Don't get involved. It sounds like an honesty factor in someone elses relationship. Unless you two are still playing around I wouldn't get into the situation.

Oldfart 04-04-2002 04:22 AM

Find a really good excuse to not be Best Man and miss the

wedding completely. If he hasn't the balls to tell her, keep quiet

and stay away. Being best man in those circumstances is risky,

with a really good chance to lose the friendship totally.

axe31 04-04-2002 07:29 PM

thanks for the advice every one your right must be his desition
if he tells her ok but if later she finds out that the best man is
an ex would make more trouble i will have to bow out as best man if he tells her then can ask her if its ok

axe31 04-06-2002 05:22 PM

ok he is going to tell her by the way we are not
still messing around would never date some one
who is with some one

Sarriah 04-06-2002 06:33 PM

Well thats good news, hope it makes things easier for you now :D

Grumble 04-08-2002 06:25 AM

thanks for letting us know what happened. The advice you got here was good so I didnt repeat it.
I told a friend once that his wife was coming on to me. It was honest but a stupid thing to do. I lost a friend, initiated a marriage break up and got the blame for it. I would never do that again. A lesson from the University of Life that I have graduated in

quisath 04-09-2002 09:40 AM

So there you have it..................Mums the word.

axe31 04-12-2002 12:11 PM

i am going to be best man with her blesings
she came round and we discused it she is now
shure that i am no threat to her and i have
a new freind even got an invite to the hen
night


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