I was reminded of an old Playboy Party Joke by this...won't recite the whole thing here, but the punchline was, "If a girl coughed, I fucked her!"

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Plug me into somethin'

If the theory does not conform to the facts, then the facts must be discarded.

No good deed ever goes unpunished

Never argue with an idiot. He'll drag you down to his level, & beat you with experience.