ASH,

I believe the reason you find men who are intimidated by you is because when a beautiful woman such as yourself is obviously confident in her sexuality, guys who are somewhat lacking in self confidence (in life and/or sex) feel more confident that they can get SOMEWHERE with her because there are fewer barriers to break through. Also, this lack of self-confidence lends one's personality to desiring domination... a role you can obviously fulfill. This personality is the type that would basically let you live his life for him, and would do whatever you want... and may even mistake this desire for "guidance" as a devotional love that would do anything for you. Ladies, this may be why the nice guy you are interested in seems to be caught up with some overbearing pain in the ass who treats him like shit. Forgive me for being Freudian, but it may be what he needs... what he's used to... (forgive me) what he grew up with.
The problem arrives when the stronger female personality does not wish to be a controlling bitch. In this case, a strong wonderful spirit such as yours needs another strong spirit with which it can bond, the two feeding off each other and strengthening each other. A relationship with a weaker persona will most undoubtedly be based on sex. Not that that's always a bad thing, but it can lead to a very premature "clinginess" when a guy feels he accomplished something with you and likes the feeling, and then (unfortunately) a complete reversal of attitude when he feels like you are blowing him off because you don't NEED him the way he needs you.
Anyway, I go now to burn my soapbox. Sorry all... I thought maybe something could apply to what several people are wondering.

-PS Nice pic, ASH

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"It is nothing to die... it is terrible not to live"
-- Victor Hugo