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Originally Posted by osuche
My question here, is....For those of you in a long-term relationship, have you ever experienced a prolonged loss of attraction to your mate? This loss of attraction might mean that you no longer find them sexy, or even have a hard time wanting to have sex with them.
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Yes, this happened to me with my ex-husband several years ago.
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Originally Posted by osuche
Did you manage to reverse the process? If yes, how did you "flip the switch" and start finding them sexy again?
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I didn't manage this
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Originally Posted by osuche
If you didn't reverse the process, what did you decide to do as a result of that loss of attraction?
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I left him
NOT, I should say,
purely as a result of the problems in the bedroom, there were other factors and in short I couldn't see myself growing old with him. We started out together quite young and I don't think I was really ready to settle. We were together several years but split in 2000.
During our marriage, when I was trying to get my 'want' of him back, I read a LOT of erotica. I
had to read it to get in the mood. It wasn't a good time for me at all, as I knew he knew I was losing interest and that made me feel terrible.
Is it
only your husband you're not interested in? I mean, has your sex drive disappeared completely or is it just the thought of sex with your husband that's not appealing? I'm not sure what advice I would give whatever the answers to these two questions but I know I was attracted to other men, so although my sex drive was nearly non-existent, I knew there was
something there, just not for my husband
This isn't a very positive message and I'm sorry about that. I hope you can work things out
Just adding here: have you spoken with your husband about this? Does he know how you feel? Try to do this
Communication is so important and if he's doing something (or not doing something) that's contributing to your lack of interest in him, he might be able to do something about it if he knows how you're feeling. You could work through it together. He could take more of an active role in trying to get you in the mood during the day, for example. This used to work very well when my ex-husband and I were first together. It was like all-day foreplay!