THIS IS SUPPOSED TO BE A TRUE STORY:

Outside Bristol Zoo there is a car park for 150 cars and 8 coaches.

There also used to be a very pleasant attendant with a ticket machine charging cars £1 and coaches £5.

This parking attendant worked there for all of 25 years , then one day just didn't turn up for work...
"Ho hum", said Bristol Zoo Management - "better phone up the City Council and get them to send a new parking attendant" ......

"Err no", said the Council, "that car park is your responsibility" ...
"Err no", said Bristol Zoo Management, "the attendant was employed by the City Council, wasn't he?" .....

"Err NO!"

Sitting in his villa in Spain is a bloke who had been taking daily the car park fees amounting to an estimated £400 per day at Bristol Zoo for the last 25 years...

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Calm, quiet, smooth, devastating