Ok before I get into this let me say Irish sometimes the reason the grass is greener, is because it has more bullshit under the surface. Just a thought to keep in mind, ok


Now on to silentsoul

Hey bud; I am not sure what to say to you. Other than I feel you have so many issues going on under your skin that you don’t really know how to handle any of them and now you are starting to feel overwhelmed. I have read some of your other post and get the feeling that a lot of what you are going through is just what people call life. The fact that you are young makes this feeling seam huge and unmanageable. I can tell you that in my early 20; s I was a mess I could not deal with marriage, a new baby, the stress of work and a home. Things seemed so out of control I keep thinking to my self that this was not the life I wanted, what happened to hanging out with my friends going to parties and not having anymore stress than “what’s for dinner mom”. Well life forced me to grow up a lot faster than I wanted to. I could be wrong but I get the same feelings when I read your posts. This topic of not finding you wife attractive is bullshit and you know it. Now I will agree you may not look at her the same as you did before you were married. I read last week in one of your posts that she told you she was pregnant (congratulations). A baby will cause us men to look at our significant others in a new light. You mentioned that you are afraid of hurting the baby that can make you distance your self from your wife. Some guys can’t handle the fact that their sexual partner their sensual; bed shaking swinging from the chandeliers fuck beast wife is now a mother and mothers should not act that way. This will also cause your feeling for her to slip. Or maybe you are just feeling trapped by marriage and the baby and that you want to walk on the wild side one more time. I don’t know which issues or combination of issues is bringing up this current dilemma of yours but I do know that the key to working this out is for you to decide if you want to stay married or do you want to split up, (I hope that you will stay together) once you have made up your mind I believe that communication is the very foundation of any relationship. In you case I would suggest that you seek professional help, get some counseling. The people here at pixies are wonderful and give great advice but you just can not get the help I feel you need here. My wife and I went through counseling several years ago and with out a doubt in my mind I believe that it saved my marriage

On a side note I just picked up a copy the book “Kosher Adultery” “how to seduce and sin with your spouse” by the Rabbi Shmuley Boteach. Now let me say I am not Jewish but I will take good advice any where I can find it. This book deals with what leads to infidelity, what causes bedroom boredom and waning attraction, how to separate the friendship and passion in a marriage. I have just started reading it so I can’t give you an opinion yet but so far it looks good. If you are reluctant to talk with a counselor at least pick up some books on the subject.

__________________
Mind what poeple do not only what they say, for deeds will betray a lie.
Terry Goodkind, Wizzards Fifth Rule

There are two things a real man likes--danger and play;and he likes woman because she is the most dangerous of playthings.
Nietzsche


Monogamy does not have to mean Monotony