The naughtiest thing to do is to have sex by the river on the south bank when its dark! But make it a quickie as the Gendarmerie may get you.

Otherwise if you are near the centre, it is a beautiful city to walk everywhere - take lunch and return to the hotel for afternoon delights.

Montmatre, home of the Moulin Rouge, is seedy but a must see area and Sacre Coeur at the high end is great for a lazy daytime walk and lunch.

The Louvre is a bit overpowering unless you know what you want to see - my favourite is the Musee D'Orsee for the impressionists and the Rodin is truly erotic.

Don't forget to get your "carnet" of metro tickets - you get ten at a reduced rate.

There are loads of good clubs - modern rock and roll was the rage when I was last there - sorry can't remember any names.

Enjoy!!