In my trade, smartasses abound... 4 guys in my dept., highly stressful workplace, the gallows humor flows like a river day in & out... would be a great sitcom, but for the censors...

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Plug me into somethin'

If the theory does not conform to the facts, then the facts must be discarded.

No good deed ever goes unpunished

Never argue with an idiot. He'll drag you down to his level, & beat you with experience.