loula,

thank you for the suggestions - i will try to be more vocal about what does and does not feel good. the only other sexual partner i had was entirely focused on me giving pleasure to her, so i am not as comfortable knowing exactly what i like or what feels good. i think part of it is a confidence thing - and i guess i just need to provide her more feedback.

but her confidence is low in several things, she does not like to be on top. i should rephrase that, she really likes it, she just doesnt feel like she is, in her words "doing it right". again i dont know what to tell her as the experiences i have had were mostly in giving.

i had a thought to perhaps buy videos that may help, we talked about it and i purchased the "better sex" video series. we were both happy to watch them, and got some information out of them - but it was more clinical than anything and it was not quite what we were looking for. i have looked online for more couple related movies - not the hardcore xxx movies filled with who knows that, just erotic movies for couples and i cannot seem find anything like that.

do you think that is a good idea? anyone have any movies that they could suggest for couples? something that may help us both learn a little more?