My first husband had a "handicap" in that he drank a lot of beer and watched every sport known to man...but when it came to sex, he just wasn't interested...unless he was asleep, and then he'd talk in his sleep about sex and my sexiness all the time. The times between sex with us could amount to anywhere from 3 months to 7 months...and yes, it took it's toll on our marriage. I gave the marriage all the chances I could because I loved the man I married and I hoped things would eventually, somehow (through therapy maybe...if only he'd go), change. After 8 looooooong years with him, I finally had to face reality and leave. I have no bad words for my ex...just a sad feeling of love lost for a basic, but essential, part of what makes up a good marriage.

I must say, it's not like I didn't know his ways and it all happened after we married. I married him with all the love and hope in my heart and tried to "change" him after the fact. In retrospect, I should have never married him in the first place because I know now that marriage isn't the vehicle in which to change the one you love. In other words...when I said "I do", I was thinking "I'll deal with it later".

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Minds are like parachutes. They only work when they are open.

~Thomas Dewar~