I don't have kids. And all my friends' kids are under the age of 5, so I have no valid working hypothesis. However, my best response is that:
1. You're never going to be able to shield your kids from these messages
2. Most of the kids in your kids' schools will have stupid and close-minded ideas about sex, because most of their parents will too.
3. The best thing you can do is to have an open communicative relationship with your kids.....ask good questions....give them your time.....let them feel you are a real confidante
4. It's better to talk to your kids and *know* what they're up to (and steer them into doing it safely) than to stick your head in the sand.
5. Talk about sex openly. Maybe if it's less taboo, there will be less obsession on their parts. I know it worked with me and alcohol.
6. Don't rely on your kids' school to give them good sex ed
7. Know your kids friends
8. Sometimes "cool mom" isn't the best. Kids need boundaries. However, ALWAYS explain "WHY" you require/think/believe some way....with reason, I think kids can adjust. And even respect their parents. However, arbitrary-ness is one of the easiest causes of kid disillusionment with their parents.
/me inserts disclaimer about not having kids again
OK...Now I'm going to leave it to the experts to weigh in.
Go to bed, wyndhy..you'll feel better in the morning.