I know what kind of fear your in and i am sooo sorry to hear that you are going thru this . here are my thoughts:
get a restraining order anyway what they fail to tell you when you do get one is that you must without fail call the cops every single time that he violates it which can be hard to follow thru with but if you don't then you are responsible for it not being any good. that said, here is more useful advice do you own a bat or a gun? only partly serious there. Do you have any friends who can stay with you while he is in town nothing slows down a good heated discussion much better than a third wheel some one who can call the cops if necessary. Try not to be alone with him at any time if you do decide to "talk" with him again it'll slow down that possibility of things getting out of hand .
Is it possible for you to be "out of town" while he is in town?
these are my best suggestions I'm sure there are others but I can't think of anything more right now. And know that my thoughts are with you be strong (you can be btw) I know you can do anything that you need to so do it right. and good luck .

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