OK, this is going to be long:

CAUTION: I brake for hallucinations.

Cover me, I'm changing lanes.

WARNING: Driver does not play well with small cars.

Friends don't let friends drive Chevys

Honk if you think I'm Jesus

If you can read this, you're in range.

I'm not lost, I'm exploring.

My Wife's other car is a broom.

BEER : Helping white guys dance since 1842

Jesus Love You - everyone else just thinks your an asshole.

You can't spell CRAP without RAP

God hates Rednecks - Tornadoes only hit trailer parks.

Dicourage inbreeding!! Ban Country Music!!

Want a taste of religion? Bite a minister.

JESUS SAVES... But Gretzky gets the rebound, he shoots, he SCORES!!

Suicide is a way of telling God 'you can't fire me, I QUIT!'

Backoff, I'm a postal worker.

I'm not tailgaiting I'm drafting!

Happiness is a Belt Fed Automatic Machine Gun

Fight crime, shoot back

If guns are outlawed, only outlaws will accidentally shoot their children

Guns don't kill people, they just make it easier

My karma ran over your dogma

I drive this way just to piss you off

Lost your cat? Look under my tires

I wonder how you'd drive with that cellphone shoved up your ass

Beautify Texas. Put a Yankee on a bus

Welcome to Texas, now go home

A bartender is just a pharmacist with a limited inventory

Mafia staff car

Thank you for not breeding

Some people are only alive because it's illegal to kill them

A fool and his money are my best friends

A fool and his money are soon partying


If you want more, I have more