Here are a bunch of thoughts I've had swimming around my head. They are not neccessarily coherent. Feel free to comment, but do keep this in mind.

It's not easy to get a single straight answer. Perhaps that's because there isn't one. Maybe the "doesn't count" answer is easy to be skeptical of because there are such obvious interests in giving such an answer falsely, the "good girl" image, sensitivity for the male's feelings. But should there be similar scrutiny of "counts" answers? Particularly answers of the "Oh, you KNOW it counts, girlfriend! WOO!" type. If size has macho connotations for the male, does it have similar connotations for the female accepting it? A bragging right like that afforded to the female dating the 6-pack or 45cm biceps?

It's not like breast size. Breast size is obvious, within slight margins of error, from first front or side glance. A man finding a breast size range unappealing will quite possibly never give a woman any sign at all that he finds her unappealing for this reason because if it means so much to him he might never approach. A woman usually must deem a man to be suitable for sex at least once before having an opportunity to judge his penis and rejection at this point, or after sex, with penis size one of few possible factors, relative to the number of factors for rejection at first glance.

Breast size, too, has fair representation accross a large size spectrum in erotic fantasy. Penis size, where mentioned, and it usually is when any vivid description of it is given, is overwhelmingly (in terms of frequency) large. "She gave a great gasp upon seeing his mediocre member" just doesn't work. Yet, small breasts are routinely given their due as sexually appealing, albeit this is generally confined to perky ones, though smaller ones tend to fit this bill. Perhaps breasts are praised on account of shape rather than size with standards remaining difficult to attain....in any case, they are different.

Vaginal size though does rate a mention in this context. We frequently hear of tight pussies, never of loose, stretched and worn-out ones. But then, tightness refers to fit rather than size. A large woman taking a very large man is still "tight". On the subject, women who claim to require a large penis rarely seem to publicly ponder their size. Perhaps they would be more satisfied after a regime of Kegels than trying to find Mother Nature's most gifted? You know who's hung like a horse? My cousin's horse. You'd think that maybe judging 95% of men inadequate (I don't remember much from first-year stats nor much in detail from size surveys but I seem to remember men between about 4.5" and 7" falling within two standard deviations of the mean) would prompt some introspection about one's own size....I personally won't hold my breath waiting for the TV drama featuring men sharing disappointment at finding women with wonderful personalities but sporting pussies like clowns' pockets.

Would there be downsides to being large? I personally would hate to think that I could not penetrate a woman I loved because I was too large, or that I would be inclined to stay with a woman whose company I did not enjoy because she was capable of taking my enormity.

Perhaps it is unfortunate in some ways that a man's ego is wrapped up so tightly in pleasing women sexually. Perhaps the same impulses that drive a man to be an eager student of cunnilingus also drive him to existential angst when contemplating his non-huge member. Men with small penes have spoken of letting go of the desire to please women with penetration, for why should they care about the woman's orgasm? I for one do not care if a man should see my package, I do care if a woman does and explodes into fits of laughter, or asks me have I entered her yet, or claims she felt nothing, or gossips as much to her girlfriends.

More to come if I think of any.

__________________
I want to know everything
I want to be everywhere
I want to fuck everyone in the world
I want to do something that matters

Are you prepping for a dissertation? If yes, I recommend much experimental research with Pixie ladies. I would be willing to contribute some time to the cause.

__________________
Life is too short not to love and be loved....preferably multiple times in one night.

I think men talk to women so they can sleep with them and women sleep with men so they can talk to them. ~ Jay McInerney

Belial...

Very well written I will be waiting to read more... very thought provoking....

Belial,

I owe you a reply to this question, since you raised the point with me in PM and I've been rude in not replying to it sooner (though I have been formulating a few responses in my mind for some time now).

In response to your first paragraph: I imagine that the 'size counts' question is like may others in life. It varies from person to person. A lot of it depends on what a lady finds stimulating. Some women's pleasure is more clitoral and others more vaginal (personally I'm a clit girl, myself) but even with vaginal pleasure, I'd argue that one of the most sensitive spots in the vagina (the so called G-spot) is within easy reach of any penis, and it's the angle the penis is stimulating that's important in giving g-spot pleasure......it also has to do with staying power, and that of course is something that can be worked on over time. I'm not saying that there are no women out their who prefer larger dicks, I'm saying that for every woman who wants a 'monster' there are probably two women, who want a 'normal bloke'.

A good friend of mine who's had far more men than me (we're talking multiples of tens more than me, not 'a few' more) once said to me that men's members are like eggs - they all come in different sizes but unless you line one up next to the other, you really can't tell the difference. From a personal, point of view, I couldn't agree more, but then I've never been interested in size. Being a woman with hideously large breasts, I know all too well that big doesn't often equal beautiful, and from my experience, I'd say that large dicks don't equal great shags.

I'll admit that you've scared me a little bit with your second paragraph. I really don't like the idea that guys would rule me out before getting to know me because I happen to have breasts a certain size. I'd like to think that on the physical level, if I may not have breasts that are the size they like, then perhaps I have great legs, a delicious arse, a sexy smile or beautiful eyes, and that one of those things might be enough to warrant a guy's attention, rather than me being rejected instantly because I'm 'ample' not 'perky' in the breast department. I imagine, you're now thinking to yourself 'well I wouldn't rule you out just because you have one physical feature that isn't my ideal' and that would be true for you, I'm sure. The reason? Because you are a nice, non-shallow, respectful, kind hearted human being. You wouldn't decide whether to accept or reject me based on how much breast tissue I happen to have. So my question is this: don't you think that there are women out there like you - who don't judge and wouldn't reject you on the basis of just one of your physical features? And if so, why care about the opinions of other women, who are shallow, I doubt you'd even be interested in that type of woman to begin with, so the chances of you finding yourself in bed with one of these women is highly unlikely. My point is that by the time a woman has committed to sleeping with you, it's because they're attracted to you, it's because they care about you, it's because they want to progress the relationship, it sure as fuck isn't because they want to laugh at you. To be honest, your average woman is probably not selfless enough to be entirely concerned with how big your dick is on the first night together....she's busy worrying about her cellulite (like you give a shit about that - hell, you prolly don't even quite understand what it is!) the size of her boobs (but hell you're just pleased she's letting you see them!) whether you're going to think she's a slut if she's too forward or frigid if she's not forward enough, whether her blow job technique is good enough etc etc etc......at the end of the day, she's not going to laugh at you, and she's not going to reject you and she's not going to gossip about you to her friends if she's a decent human being and you're treating her properly. The only guy I've ever bitched about size wise is a guy who was a toad to me (and his girlfriend at the time) and who had such an arrogant attitude that it was a shock to find him a little bit smaller than I expected. He wasn't even the smallest guy I'd been with, but the smallest guy I've ever had, was also some of the best sex of my life (the man had a filthy mouth and wasn't afraid to use it!)

OK - erotic fiction: when you read stories on Pixies do you pay attention to the gender of the writer? I always do. I've noticed that men describe thigns in numbers much more than women do. Men write about how many inches the hero of the tale has, even the women's cup sizes (I'm hurt to find that 'perfect sized breasts' are often 36DD and that beautiful women weigh.....well.....a fuck of a lot less than I do!) whereas women will just say 'large' or 'perfect' or 'beautiful' or 'generous' without specifying. And no, women don't 'gasp at his mediocre sized manhood' because why on earth would they? Seeing an average size penis is what we're expecting, we'd only maybe gasp at a larger one, because it would be a shock (and even possibly a bit scary). But what you've got to remember that this is fiction.....just like porn is....well it's porn.....and real sex isn't like that. Real sex has bathroom breaks, contraception, tissues to wipe up, telephone calls interrupting you, fanny farts (sometimes!) creaking limbs, awkward positions that seem like a good idea at the time, and then prove impossible, laughter (in a good way!) and it also has some other stuff: love, trust, friendship and lust. I know it's possible to have sex without these things, but for a first timer, I'd highly recommend that all these ingredients are there (or at least, say 3 of them!)

As far as vaginal size goes, I'm sure there are differences, and I'm sure it matters to some guys, and I agree that there's not much said about it, but that's because in general, even the most 'worn-out' pussy is gong to feel something entering it (I think most women can feel a tampon going in and even the smallest men are bigger than a tampon!) As for TV dramas........the double standards continue in the media despite our best efforts to strive for equality.......I wonder if you're referring to a particular show, and in that case whether it was written by a man or a woman, or whether, if written by a woman, she herself has ever been disappointed with a guy's size, or whether she was writing something she thought people would be amused to see.

Your last paragraph worries me the most.....YOU have the ability to give a woman an orgasm, whether you have a penis a foot long, or no penis at all. In casual sex you may have no interest in your partner's pleasure, but then again, that's often the case in that situation, regardless of the guy's penis size. To re-iterate, no woman is going to be bitchy to you about your size when you're in bed with her, or afterwards for that matter.....by having sex with you, she's making herself vulnerable too. Women are highly sexual creatures, and we can be sexually aggressive, but that doesn't mean we're heartless self centred sex addicts who only value men for how 'useful' they are to us sexually, no more than men are.

Trust me, if sex were as emotionally complicated as all of this, no bugger would ever risk it! The reality is, it's an enjoyable contact between two people, not a war or a competition, and while I can really sympathise with you for being worried, there really is no need to.....unfortunately this is only something you'll discover once you've experienced it, and that is something that will happen in its own time, when you're with the right person, at the right time and in the right situation.

:hug:

Still think I really should just come over there and prove it to you, but Fussy doesn't seem keen on the idea! LOL

__________________
"Time flies like an arrow -
Fruit flies like a banana"

M Y - N A U G H T Y - P I C T U R E S ! !

First lemme put my name on that list of lab rats, right behind Osuche......and the second thing i wanta say, I have no other way to put it except in my usual not so delicate manner......

I do not have a tiny hiny....never have...never will.....and just because some one doesn't like my not-so-tiny-hiny....well, big damn deal!!! I lived quite happily without that person yesterday, they sure as hell ain't gonna make much of a dent in my today and i can assure you that come tomorrow, they won't even be a distant memory to me. I just don't understand why you let those thoughts get to you. I'd put all those "woohoo big'un" comments in the same category as high school locker room bragging. And I gotta admit, if i thought about it much, i could get downright offended if i didn't know you better. Not all of us women are so shallow as to think only a big'un could be what pleases us. I would hope that if you love someone, you love all of them....a crooked nose, baldness, a not-tiny-hiny, whatever falls outside of the media's idea of perfection. To me, it's the whole person attraction, not just various pieces and parts.

Plus, sex is like a good vacation....you can plan the route and various stops along the way.....but until you actually get in your car and make the trip, you'll never really understand all the fun from just reading the tourist brochures.

For myself it has never been the package but more whats with in the person themselves. Looks are great but who wants a beautiful package if the contents are sour as hell.

Am I the biggest, hell no I am not. I know a couple of guys that have a terrible time just having normal intercourse because they are what they consider a bit large. One admited that he at times had wrapped a towel around the base of it so he wouldn't penetrate his partner so deeply as to injure her.

Personally for me I really do not care whether a Lady has large Breasts or small ones. I don't care if she has the perfect hourglass figure or not. If a relationship was strictly about looks what a crass bunch of buttholes we would be.

What is she really like? Does she care about herself and those around her? Beauty can be measured in many ways besides just looks or physical attributes.

As oversexed as I think I am at times I don't just want someone to Fuck, I want someone that I can be intimate with and be able to look myself in the eye later. I want her to find it as pleasurable as I did and at the same time be able to look her in the eye and tell how much I respect her. I always try to express how greatful I am for the pleasure she has given me and hope to hell I have given her the same in return.

That is what I have always likes about the Ladies here at Pixies. Under all the bravado They are all a wonderful and caring group. I could list them all here but it would take so much space that that I probably couldn't do it in a month of sundays. They same goes for the Men here.

As for me I have quit trying to fathom the things that I have know I have no control over. Instead I just try and enjoy the beauty contained in each and every one who cross my path either here or in life in general. Lou I love and enjoy you. Whats more I respect the hell out of you

Sam

PS I thought the orginal post was by Loulabell but what I wrote applies to bedail and everyone else as well

__________________
The Mind Is Your Limit. As Long As Your Mind Can
Envision It, You Can Do It!

Lou,

The point I was trying to make with the second paragraph was not that I would, or even that a significant number of men would judge a woman based on her breast size. The point I was trying to make was that breast size and penis size are different issues for a number of reasons. A man approaching a woman almost certainly already knows and approves of or at the very least accepts her breast size before she has invested emotionally in him. The same is not true of penis size, unless men were to walk around in Speedos with erections in public (I'm sure you'd hate that ). I can understand that you would be scared at what I wrote but it is my thought that if a man was hung-up on breast size (not that I am suggesting that many are) and found yours undesirable you would probably never know, because he can discern this, with an acceptable margin of error, without ever saying a word to you. I am certainly not suggesting women in general to be shallow, either; hell, there are so many wonderful women here that I'd have to be going around with my eyes closed to believe that. I just think that some peoples' equation of penis size anxiety to breast size anxiety is short-sighted.

I'm certainly aware that erotic fiction is not real life. But do they not represent the desires of the writer or intended audience?

I was not suggesting that men should always abandon the pursuit of their partner's orgasm to save their egos. But, I do think that men who feel eager to please are more likely to be anxious about the size of their organs being insufficient. The attitude I suggest is not one of indifference to the woman's pleasure "right off the bat", but more of a "So you say it was bad because my dick's too small? Fine, I don't care" attitude, just as you might dismiss a person who finds your face ugly.

kathy,

What you said about "woohoo big'un" comments was pretty much what I was saying in my first paragraph. By no means do I suggest all women think they need a big dick, merely that those that like to shout it from the rooftops should perhaps engage in some introspection. I absolutely agree with you with regard to what the media seems to portray as ideal. But, I am observing the sentiments I speak of from women who are not participants in the media. So I think it is a different phenomenon. I am sorry if what I wrote appeared to tar women with a broad brush.

:hug:

Oh, and yes, err...subjects for the upcoming experiments may register here

__________________
I want to know everything
I want to be everywhere
I want to fuck everyone in the world
I want to do something that matters

Now, a subthread....

What exactly does "filled" mean? Does it mean that the entire potential space of the vagina is filled and that any more penis could not possibly fit, or that the space as it currently is has been filled? l thought perhaps the idea would be similar to filling a balloon with air - there's filling, and then there's stretching.

__________________
I want to know everything
I want to be everywhere
I want to fuck everyone in the world
I want to do something that matters

OK, I'll be the shallow one here.

Don't think of me as a jackass, this is just how I am (ok maybe I am a jackass...!!!).

I simply cannot get into sex with someone if I don't find them attractive. Perfect - doesn't exist. But attractive to me PHYSICALLY is what most likely drew me to her in the first place.

I prefer women with smaller chests. I'm more of an ass man than anything though. And oh yeah, redheads are tops, too. And...I digress.

I'm not saying I can't enjoy being with a woman with a big chest, because I can. But chances are I wouldn't be "pursuing" her in the first place, if I thought her knockers were too big for my tastes.

Now...lets say I find someone that's what I am looking for physically. Then we fall in love because what's inside her is just as good, or better, than what's outside.

She pops out 2-3 kids. Body changes. Bigger boobs. Bigger butt. A little bit around the middle. Whatever. I'm already in love with her...and once that happens the physical side - while still important (get in the gym, dammit!!!) - doesn't matter as much.

I can't look at someone and fall in love/lust with her personality. It's a physical thing at first...that's the attraction. The rest is the icing on the cake - if it works out. Or, it's the sour grapes if it doesn't!

Hope I made sense...!!! :d:

JustSomeGuy - so you've never got to know a woman as a friend and then fallen in love with her personality, and wanted to take the relationship further? You are really limiting yourself....you'd be amazed how physical attraction can grow out of mental attraction, but the same thing is rarely true in reverse.

Belial: filled. I don't know about other women, but I'm pretty sure we're all the same.....when there's nothing inside our vagina, the walls of our vaginas touch on either side.....there's no 'gap' there waiting to be filled up with something so it's not a case of 'the space as it currently is has been filled'. So anything that goes inside us, we can feel (hell it'd be something of a design floor if we couldn't......all sorts of things could end up there without our noticing!) The feeling of being 'filled' is more of an emotional one (for me at least) than a physical sensation of pleasure. There is the feeling that we are attracted to someone, and we want to feel them as close into us as possible, hence our desire for intercourse. We don't need to be 'stretched' and I don't think most of us are interested in that (one of the reasons for me, is that I don't want to lose the elasticity of my pussy - silly but that's to do with my own self esteem issues, since I think my pussy is one of my best features!).

Finally, unless they start making cocks the size of new born babies (the biggest of which would weigh, what, 10lbs or so?) a guy is never going to fill a woman to the point where no more penis could possibly fit, since the vagina is a pretty amazing organ and can accomodate something as large as that. However, to re-iterate, when you're inside your woman, you're going to feel as though you're filling her, and she's going to feel that too, since the vagina is designed that way.

Sad_Sam - thank-you so much for the compliment honey *blush blush*

__________________
"Time flies like an arrow -
Fruit flies like a banana"

M Y - N A U G H T Y - P I C T U R E S ! !

Pass the sign up sheet, I want to help. (and sorry about the spelling, having a bad dys day).

But honestly, I'd be cheating a bit. See, I've DONE this research already. And I'm not just spouting platitudes; it really, truly isn't a big damned deal.

I know, I know. Just troll through the comments on guy's pics here, and you'll find women passing compliments about men who have more than the average gift. I'm sure I've done it. But I know for a fact that I've also gone a little swoony at a guy who posted ages ago, not because of the size of his dick (which was pretty average as I remember it) but because it really did have a lovely curve to it. Nothing to do with size. And I think that's one of the things you have to remember when you're looking at pro-sizish comments, or hearing them in movies, or what have you. It is entirely possible that people might be complimenting form. And

Truthfully, cocks have got that much in common with breasts. The aesthetic standards imposed on them have little to do with their function. Babies don't get more milk from big breasts. And despite the press, large cocks don't give better lays. But both organs have become symbols of sexuality, and all the way back to prehistoric art the symbol of sexuality is exagerated to draw attention to it. This is best demonstrated by the exception, some archaic statues of fertility goddesses emphasize the stomach or vulva (and those can look downright scary to modern, western eyes) rather than the breasts. In our culture, it's most often dicks and breasts.

But does that make it real? Obviously not in the case of breasts, but there I have to say that breasts have a better PR officer. It's clear that's purely aesthetic. Women have spent a lot of energy teaching each other that we are each of us attractive in our own way (nonetheless breast augmentations are still one of the most commonly undergone proceedures). Guys, probably because it's not something that gets judged in the first glance, haven't had that education. For a lot of you, I imagine you watch Sex in the City, and feel like you're finally getting the real story. Size DOES matter, Kim Cattrell said so.

Or at least her speach writer did. Who may not know what they're talking about.

The woman on the corner, talking to her girlfriends, bragging about the huge dick she screwed that weekend? Noise. She's part of the same societal matrix...she's heard it her whole life. Hung like a horse = good. She's bragging in shorthand, everyone does. You can't take talk like that for data, it's too embedded in the culture.

The real question you ask, Bel, is does it make a difference in bed. Really and truly. In a blind fuck test, would women go for the bigger cock even most of the time. I know I wouldn't. And I had the worst possible history.

Poor innocent little Ginger's first experience was with a guy whom society would call blessed. Having only really had experience with tampons up till that point, never having owned a vibrator much larger than my thumb, and not being the dirty pic coneseur I am today....I honestly gaped. That was in no way gonna fit. But it did, and it was wonderful. And I didn't know ALL guys didn't come that shape. Learned different while we were together (he was an education in many ways), and decided I was a lucky girl.

My next experience was the other end of the scale. Slightly smaller than what I have since learned to be average. Was I disappointed when I got the wrapping off? Yeah. Why? Because I'm an American girl. I was taught to believe that the reason my first was so damned good was because he was so damned big. "Ah well," says Ginger, "better than nothing." Did it feel different? Yes. Why? Cause guys feel different. They screw differently. I don't know why. Did I feel less filled, shockingly no. Was the sex less good, not really. Less practiced, therefore less effective, but not because I was feeling a lack of something. And we eventually got JUST as good.

It turns out that the "tight pussy" is another damned myth. The vagina is like a sock. It starts out collapsed and stretches to accomidate what's put in it. Girls are tighter on their first time, in part because we're TENSE as hell and tend not to be as well lubricated. Everything else you feel is muscle control. Babies don't stretch us out, but they can damage the muscles (from what I understand), which then have to be rebuilt. But women really are one size fits all, and we're wrapped just as tightly around anything you put in us. We're terribly accomidating creatures, biologically. The word tight gets used in erotic writing because it's evocative as hell, the idea of something tight around your dick is going to turn you on. Honest to god, if it weren't true....tampons would come in sizes to fit (not just different absorbancy). They'd HAVE to.

Can we have great sex with big cocks? Yup. Why? Cause some of us like penetration. ANY penetration. Can we occasionally have mind blowing sex with big cocks? Sure. Can some women prefer sex with men who have a salami in their shorts? Yeah. Some can. But I think it's for the same reason some women like leather. It's a kink. It's a mind game. It's a result of what they heard and saw and felt growing up as their sexual identity developed. They SEE a big cock and get aroused, the degree of arousal determines the intensity of their orgasm. NOT the cock itself.

But, back to the sexual adventures of yours truly. The guy I'm with now, whom I love and with whom I've had the best sex of my life, isn't all that "well endowed". I slept with him before I was emotionally committed, I could've easily jumped ship and looked elsewhere. But he's better than anyone I've ever been with, because he knows how to make love to me. Maybe he wouldn't be as good with the girl downstairs...at least until they've gotten to know each other's twists. But honestly, our first time was better than my first time with my largest lay. The ONLY point I regret was when the idiot appologised for his "lack of size," for which I had to hit him with a pillow and punish him with a blow job. BTW, he fits PERFECTLY in my mouth and just up against the back of my throat...and I knew he would the first time I saw him. THAT turned me on, welcome to one of my personal kinks .

I have never yet laughed when a man dropped his drawers unless he's drawn a smily on the head of his cock. I've never yet kicked a man out of my bed for not living up to a standard. And while I have ONCE not realized that penetration had begun (because 2 hours of intermittent oral and vibration will eventually NUMB you), I sure as hell did before he had finished his first stroke...and he wasn't one of nature's wonder's either. I have never ever felt "nothing", and I think women who say that are purely being hurtful. And gf gossip is dictated as much by society, what we think will impress our friends, more than anything else. That said, it's something I DON'T talk about with folks who know my guys...I'm even a little uncomfortable talking about it here...and that's saying something, as comfortable as this place is. I never bragged about my first to my friends. I don't want it to sound like I'm bragging here.

So does it make a physical difference? Biology tells me no. Personal experience tells me no. Television/old wives tales tell me something else....answer, turn off the damned television and have sex .

Anyway, you're right, Bel, that society gives mixed messages. And I understand the temptation to assume that the way to resolve the conflict is to guess that women are trying to protect male egos by lying to them. Hell, I have lovely curving hips...but it took me ages to believe that they weren't horribly ugly because they weren't supermodel slender. I just assumed people were lying to me to make me feel better or get me into bed. But I honestly don't know what I can say to convince you, or any other guy, beyond what I already have. If you blindfolded me, tied me down, and had a parade of dicks come screw me (and, by the way, yes PLEASE)...I really don't believe I could pick out which was which unless one was so big it HURT (and it can if it jabs your cervix)...which really isn't something one wants to be remembered for.

More than my 2cents...anyone have change for a $20?

G

Wow, such clarity and enlightenment.....thankyou so much guys....all of you.

:hug: :hug: :hug:

*feels touched*

..oh, wait, that was me touching myself But seriously, the effort you guys have gone to is amazing...

__________________
I want to know everything
I want to be everywhere
I want to fuck everyone in the world
I want to do something that matters

Ginger, you're a woman after my own heart. I think I coulda written what you said (not so eloquently) ~~ my first was very large (he was just big all over). But my S/O -- who I have been with for 10 years -- is much smaller than average. He's a 5'7" Asian...and very proportionate for his size and race. But it doesn't matter-- I love him and feel a connection with him, so the penis size doesn't matter. And all the equipment still works the same, and I receive the same amount of pleasure.

My earlier response was somewhat flippant. Mostly because I see size as a non-issue. And I see that that lovely ladies above me agree. Please quit worrying. This issue is not worth your time or thoughts.

__________________
Life is too short not to love and be loved....preferably multiple times in one night.

I think men talk to women so they can sleep with them and women sleep with men so they can talk to them. ~ Jay McInerney

GingerV and Osuche -

You ladies kick arse!

You're both absolutely right.

On one last little point that I've just thought of: I think one of the reasons that visually and mentally, some women like large cocks, is because they feel it's a reflection on how attractive they are. If a guy gets really really big when he's hard, it makes us feel desired, sexy, blah blah blah. However, for me at least, it's not how big they are when they're hard as much as the difference between their size when hard and their size when soft which is a turn on.

It has also been my experience (from watching porn mainly - I've never been with a really massive guy, and the only reason I'd be interested in doing so would be from a kind of freak show perspective!) that guys who are very big when soft, don't actually get that much bigger when they harden up - they actually stay pretty much the same size, whereas with guys who are smaller when soft, they grow fairly substantially when they become aroused.

However, I repeat, the turn on of a larger penis (or one that grews a lot larger when it is aroused) is a mental one, and makes no difference to the actual physical pleasure of sex.

I'll shut up now, I've talked far too much on this thread!

__________________
"Time flies like an arrow -
Fruit flies like a banana"

M Y - N A U G H T Y - P I C T U R E S ! !

Men grow up with an idea of our relative size in the same way that women do with regards to their breasts – well we can see them and other peoples, and there are probably as many old wives tales for both. I think that there is enormous ignorance with regard to vaginas amongst most men (myself included) and many women.

This combined with a pre-sexual liberation hangover that men are “in charge of sex” makes the size issue a one way street. I love sexually liberated people. You see the honest answers here – but you will also see women who will state a preference (for whatever reason even if its just in their heads) for larger cocks. Clearly so far the Pixie Ladies who may have this preference, have kept it to themselves on this thread. And why shouldn’t people be honest about what they prefer, there are so many other physical traits that we talk about. It doesn’t mean that they are a life and death issue or that we aren’t perfectly happy to compromise or change our preferences for the right person.

For me its just one of those things and for the vast majority of people it isn’t a big deal. But whereas I think there is too big for some and too small for others, I also do not adhere to the one size fits all vagina, from my own experiences. I have thought about this alot, I don’t want to upset anyone again by diving in two feet first.

I don’t know the medical term, but I would say there is a significant variance in the size of the opening. Don’t ask me about the sock analogy inside, I feel all sorts of strange and wonderful things going on inside there, especially during orgasm. But with the hindsight of being compatible with my partner, the size of the first opening does make a difference. I don’t know whether this is the muscle that is exercised by Kegels, but I think it is what men refer to when they say someone is loose and women who are wider may be expressing a preference for more width. If I can be crude – think of it like a hand job – if you go to the extremes and squeeze too tightly or too weakly – how good is it? But this is only one aspect of intercourse and a smaller aspect of sex and love – so you have to take it in context. Personally I do enjoy the feelings of penetration, so for me – yes – size does matter, that is a compatibility of size whether small, medium or large. This has just been my experience over the years now that this thread has made me revisit my experience – please don’t take this as some edict that must be true for everyone.

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Vigil, if you were my husband, I would give you poison.

Madam, if you were my wife, I would take it.