First post, be gentle

Google, being google, is basically in the business of gathering information. As much as possible. If you search for "number of horns on a unicorn", google will kindly inform you that a unicorn has one horn.

Which got me wondering, how much does google know about me? So, I searched for "circumference of my dick", and the results had me cracking up for a while. The first result was:
"The Strange Case Of The Missing Inches "

I mean, any article with the sentence "I know this because I can no longer shove my erect dick fully into a roll of toilet paper" is a must read, right? Show of hands (or toilet paper rolls), how many of the guys here have stuck their dicks in a roll of toilet paper?

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What, where, when?

OMG! LMAO! I can't wait for peeps to answer the toilet paper roll question!

Welcum to Pixies aucsec! Great first post!

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Minds are like parachutes. They only work when they are open.

~Thomas Dewar~

I bet it's more than we think

Welcome!

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The practice of putting women on pedestals began to die out when it was discovered that they could give orders better from there.~ Betty Grable

If I wanted your opinion, I'd remove the duct tape and ask you for it.~ Me
<~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~>
One man's dream is another man's nightmare~~~~> §¤ Lilith ¤§
~>My Scribbles<~
==>Gone Shopping<== ~Just a Quickie~ *~A Celebration Vacation~* ~Surprises~ Sleeping With the Window Open
What Did You Do Today? Self Defense Class ~Short Sweet Snippets~ § Summer Spin § Story Challenge Submission Pajamas

Was it good looking?

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Calm, quiet, smooth, devastating

I can honestly say that I haven't ever put my erect penis into a toilet paper roll.

*runs in to get a roll of TP to investigate possibilities*









Nope, that wouldn't work. I suppose I could make it fit but the problem would be that the roll wouldn't be able to spin. Nope, my penis wouldn't make a very good toilet paper holder.

Or did I miss the purpose of the exercise?

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It takes a gutless mouse to play only when the cat's away.

No love, no friendship, can cross the path of our destiny without leaving some mark on it forever. ~~ Francois Mocuriac

Confucius say, "He who masturbate into cash register come into money."

An optimist looks at the glass and says it's half full. A pessimist looks at the glass and says it's half empty. A Cubs fan looks at the glass and says, "When's it gonna spill?"

Deus Impetitio Esuritori Nullus

Why does the word 'papercut' suddenly sound so sinister?


And nope, never even occured to me.... until now.

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You know, Blackadder, for me socks are like sex. Tons of it about and I never seem to get any.

My Photos:
https://imgur.com/a/80hiRdm

OMG what a brilliant idea!

*runs to redecorate the dungeon's bathroom

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The practice of putting women on pedestals began to die out when it was discovered that they could give orders better from there.~ Betty Grable

If I wanted your opinion, I'd remove the duct tape and ask you for it.~ Me
<~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~>
One man's dream is another man's nightmare~~~~> §¤ Lilith ¤§
~>My Scribbles<~
==>Gone Shopping<== ~Just a Quickie~ *~A Celebration Vacation~* ~Surprises~ Sleeping With the Window Open
What Did You Do Today? Self Defense Class ~Short Sweet Snippets~ § Summer Spin § Story Challenge Submission Pajamas

I've tried some unusual things, & I've heard of guys trying even more unusual things, but...
No, the toilet paper roll doesn't sound appealing at all...

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Plug me into somethin'

If the theory does not conform to the facts, then the facts must be discarded.

No good deed ever goes unpunished

Never argue with an idiot. He'll drag you down to his level, & beat you with experience.

Many moons ago I toyed with making a 'pocket pussy' type device out of a toilet paper roll. Didn't take long to find out it was not going to work.

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Put me on wheels and I'll turn tricks.

Clever? Nah, I ran out of that years ago. But if you find this, let me know, k?
"The road goes ever on..." ~ Tolkien

In memory of my friend skip...
Go then, there are other worlds than these

Mine fits very nicely into the roll.



Until I start to become aroused. At that point, the thoughts flash through your head that you may have to cut the tube to free your penis.

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Though I am different from you,
We were born involved in one another.

For it was not into my ear you whispered, but into my heart. It was not my lips you kissed, but my soul.

Complete surrender should not just come at moments in which one faces overwhelming odds, but in the calm when it seems one is personally in complete control of one's life.

Is this a poor man's Viagra?

If yes, what happens when the roll gets saturated?

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Life is too short not to love and be loved....preferably multiple times in one night.

I think men talk to women so they can sleep with them and women sleep with men so they can talk to them. ~ Jay McInerney

See, that's the problem...far too stiff & scratchy when it's dry, & when it gets wet, it falls apart...

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Plug me into somethin'

If the theory does not conform to the facts, then the facts must be discarded.

No good deed ever goes unpunished

Never argue with an idiot. He'll drag you down to his level, & beat you with experience.

It doesn't fit.

Years ago I was joking around with my wife when I changed a roll and held the empty roll in front of me and pretended to penetrate her with it. (We were both fully clothed at the time.) She thought it was too big to enter her, I though that it was if anything a bit on the small side. Thus I tried it--it definitely doesn't fit.

Nope, that would be duct tape and popsicle sticks.

Or so I've heard.

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It takes a gutless mouse to play only when the cat's away.

No love, no friendship, can cross the path of our destiny without leaving some mark on it forever. ~~ Francois Mocuriac

Confucius say, "He who masturbate into cash register come into money."

An optimist looks at the glass and says it's half full. A pessimist looks at the glass and says it's half empty. A Cubs fan looks at the glass and says, "When's it gonna spill?"

Deus Impetitio Esuritori Nullus

ROFL!!!

WELCOME TO PIXIES!

Thank you for a good laugh.