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  #1  
Old 11-30-2003, 07:35 PM
Eliza's Avatar
Eliza Eliza is offline
A Little of Both
 
Join Date: Feb 2003
Location: Pa
Posts: 3,114
Talking Bill Gates and God

Bill Gates Faces God

Well, Bill," said God, "I'm really confused on this one. I'm not sure
whether to send you to Heaven or Hell!

After all, you helped society enormously by putting a computer in
almost every home in the world and yet you created that ghastly
Windows. I'm going to do something I've never done before.

I'm going to let you decide where you want to go!"

Mr.Gates replied, "Well, thanks, Lord. What's the difference between
the two?"

God said, "You can take a peek at both places briefly if it will help
you decide. Shall we look at Hell first?"

"Sure!" said Bill. "Let's go!"

Bill was amazed! He saw a clean, white sandy beach with clear waters.
There were thousands of beautiful women running around, playing in
the water, laughing and frolicking about. The sun was shining and the
temperature was just perfect! Bill said, "This is great! If this is
Hell, I can't wait to see Heaven!"

To which God replied, "Let's go!" and off they went. Bill saw puffy
white clouds in a beautiful blue sky with angels drifting about
playing harps and singing. It was nice, but surely not as enticing as
Hell.

Mr.Gates thought for only a brief moment and rendered his decision.

"God, I do believe I would like to go to Hell."

"As you desire," said God.

Two weeks later, God decided to check up on the late billionaire to
see how things were going. He found Bill shackled to a wall,
screaming among the hot flames in a dark cave. He was being burned
and tortured by demons.

"How ya doin', Bill?" asked God.

Bill responded with anguish and despair.

"This is awful! This is not what I expected at all! What happened to
the beach and the beautiful women playing in the water?"

"Oh, THAT!" said God. "That was the screen saver"
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"Only the united beat of sex and heart together can create ecstasy" ~Anaïs Nin


"The full moon is calling, the fever is high.
And the wicked wind whispers and moans.
You got your demons, you got desires
Well, I got a few of my own"
~The Eagles


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  #2  
Old 11-30-2003, 07:53 PM
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dm383 dm383 is offline
Pixies Horse Widower
 
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Location: Scotland
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ROTFLMAO!!!


If ONLY it could happen like that!

DM
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The selfish, they're all standing in line
Faithing and hoping to buy themselves time
Me, I figure as each breath goes by
I only own my mind
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  #3  
Old 11-30-2003, 08:18 PM
Mercury_Maniac Mercury_Maniac is offline
Lost without a compass.
 
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Ha, thats hilarious
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hungry? why wait.....eat me.
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  #4  
Old 11-30-2003, 08:26 PM
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Scarecrow Scarecrow is offline
Pixie since 9/3/2001
 
Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: Illinois
Posts: 16,995
OH NO Mr. Bill
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  #5  
Old 11-30-2003, 08:30 PM
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LixyChick LixyChick is offline
Everybody Stretch!
 
Join Date: Aug 2002
Location: Pa. USA
Posts: 11,637
OMGGGGGGG! LMFAO!

In the words of Nelson (from the Simpsons).........

"HA HA".............. @Bill Gates!
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Minds are like parachutes. They only work when they are open.

~Thomas Dewar~
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  #6  
Old 12-01-2003, 06:24 AM
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dicksbro dicksbro is offline
Just me.
 
Join Date: May 2002
Location: West central Illinois
Posts: 590,002
LOL! That was good.
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  #7  
Old 12-01-2003, 10:26 AM
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nikki1979 nikki1979 is offline
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lol he sooooooo deservers hell !!!!!!!!
~nikki~
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