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  #1  
Old 02-13-2006, 03:11 PM
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BIBI BIBI is offline
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A bird in the bush...or something like that.

CHENEY SAYS SHOOTING OF FELLOW HUNTER WAS BASED ON FAULTY INTELLIGENCE


Believed Shooting Victim Was Zawahiri, Veep Says


Vice President Dick Cheney revealed today that he shot a fellow hunter while on a quail hunting trip over the weekend because he believed the man was the fugitive terror mastermind Ayman al-Zawahiri.

Mr. Cheney acknowledged that the man he sprayed with pellets on Saturday was not al-Zawahiri but rather Harry Whittington, a 78-year-old millionaire lawyer from Austin, blaming the mix-up on "faulty intelligence."

"I believed I had credible intelligence that al-Zawahiri had infiltrated my hunting party in disguise with the intent of spraying me with pellets," Mr. Cheney told reporters. "Only after I shot Harry in the face and he shouted 'Cheney, you bastard' did I realize that this intelligence was faulty."

Moments after Mr. Cheney's assault on Mr. Whittington, Mr. al-Zawahiri appeared in a new videotape broadcast on al-Jazeera to announce that he was uninjured in the vice president's attack because, in his words, "I was in Pakistan."

An aide to the vice president said he believed that the American people would believe Mr. Cheney's version of events, but added, "If he was going to shoot any of his cronies right now it's a shame it wasn't Jack Abramoff."

At the White House, President George W. Bush defended his vice president's shooting of a fellow hunter, saying that the attack sent "a strong message to terrorists everywhere."

"The message is, if Dick Cheney is willing to shoot an innocent American citizen at point-blank range, imagine what he'll do to you," Mr. Bush said.

.
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  #2  
Old 02-13-2006, 04:30 PM
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gekkogecko gekkogecko is offline
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I so like parody.


I do have to ask: did you write this, or did you snag it from somewhere else?
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  #3  
Old 02-13-2006, 05:03 PM
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BIBI BIBI is offline
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LMAO....it's a snag
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Old 02-13-2006, 06:46 PM
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rockintime rockintime is offline
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It's been reported that Harry Whittington took one pellet in the ass.

President Bush placed the military on alert to be ready to assault the ranch where the incident took place because of the now irrefutable evidence of Weapons of Ass Destruction.
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  #5  
Old 02-13-2006, 06:56 PM
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PantyFanatic PantyFanatic is offline
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ROFLMAO My cheecks are cramped from laughter.

Too funny. Good snag!
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  #6  
Old 02-13-2006, 07:04 PM
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Steph Steph is offline
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LOLOL

I can't wait for The Daily Show tonight!
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  #7  
Old 02-14-2006, 10:24 AM
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RandyGal RandyGal is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by PantyFanatic
ROFLMAO My cheecks are cramped from laughter.



ROTFLMAO MINE TOO, MINE TOO.

And the cheeks on my face as well!!
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