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Old 02-29-2004, 11:57 AM
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DayDreamer DayDreamer is offline
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Join Date: Jun 2002
Location: Southern California
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hot tub and dirty jokes......

ok folks time for some jokes, feel free to post some!
young guy was complaining to his Boss about the problems he was having with his stubborn girlfriend. "She gets me so angry sometimes I could hit her," the young man exclaimed.

"Well, I'll tell you what I used to do with my wife," the boss replied, "Whenever she got out of hand I'd take her pants down and spank her."

Shaking his head the young guy replied, "That doesn't work. Once I get her pants off, I'm not mad anymore."
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A pharmacy in my home town was robbed yesterday, but all that was stolen was a large bottle of Viagra.... now the police are looking for the hardend criminals.
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A little girl and her mother were out and about. The girl, out of the blue, asked her mother, "Mommy, How old are you?"

The mother responded, "Honey, women don't talk about their age. You'll learn this as you get older."

The girl then asked, "Mommy, how much do you weigh?"

Her mother responded again, "That's another thing women don't talk about. You'll learn this, too, as you grow up."

The girl still wanting to know about her mother, then fires off another question, "Mommy, Why did you and daddy get a divorce?"

The mother, a little annoyed by the questions, responded, "Honey, that is a subject that hurts me very much, and I don't want to talk about it now."

The little girl, frustrated, sulks until she is dropped off at a friend's house to play. She consults with her girlfriend about her and her mother's conversation. The girlfriend says, "All you have to do is sneak and look at your mother's driver's license. It's just a like a report card from school. It tells you everything."

Later, the little girl and her mother are out and about again. The little girl starts off with, "Mommy, Mommy,
I know how old you are. I know how old you are. You're 32 years old."

The mother is very shocked. She asks, "Sweetheart, how do you know that?"

The little girl shrugs and says, "I just know. And I know how much you weigh. You weigh 130 pounds."

"Where did you learn that?"

The little girl says, "I just know. And I know why you and daddy got a divorce. You got an 'F' in sex."
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