12-11-2010, 12:00 PM
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Yankee in Dixie
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Join Date: Jun 2008
Location: Tennessee
Posts: 4,217
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Lilith
What's a raise?
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It's an increase in the hourly wage you are paid for performing a service/task that you have hired to do. Most haven't seen one in a very long time.
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"BOY: On a hot summer night, would you offer your throat to the wolf with the red roses? GIRL: Will he offer me his mouth? BOY: Yes. GIRL: Will he offer me his teeth? BOY: Yes. GIRL: Will he offer me his jaws? BOY: Yes. GIRL: Will he offer me his hunger? BOY: Yes. GIRL: Again, will he offer me his hunger? BOY: Yes! GIRL: Yes. BOY: On a hot summer night, would you offer your throat to the wolf with the red roses? GIRL: Yes. BOY: I bet you say that to all the boys!" -Meatloaf
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12-13-2010, 08:28 PM
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♦*♥Moderatrix♥*♦
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Join Date: Nov 2001
Location: on top of it all
Posts: 50,565
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My boss being cool and feeling just a tad bit like I am going to live through this week.
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12-14-2010, 06:16 PM
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♦*♥Moderatrix♥*♦
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Join Date: Nov 2001
Location: on top of it all
Posts: 50,565
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I saw this lady selecting a certain toy and asked if it was what the kids were wanting this Christmas. She indicated it was and so after she made her selection I took the last one left for my GAL boy and then continued shopping. About 20 minutes later that same lady approached me very timidly in another area of the store and told me she had miscounted and she really needed the one I was getting as well. I handed her the toy and wished her Merry Christmas.
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12-15-2010, 08:29 PM
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Registered User
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Join Date: Aug 2001
Location: North Australia
Posts: 17,686
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I was chasing some information on Google, when an unrelated result caught my eye.
DOC] Aboriginal Sentencing
File Format: Microsoft Word - Quick View
... the carnal knowledge of a female under 16 to whom he is tribally married[4]; ... is not by doing so acting in violation of the Fisheries Act (NT)[7]. ...
www.jca.asn.au/attachments/mildren03.doc - Similar
This is just plain bizarre.
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Calm, quiet, smooth, devastating
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12-16-2010, 01:37 AM
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Causer of Unrest
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Join Date: Jan 2004
Location: Arizona
Posts: 4,005
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A joke the hubby sent me today:
A shepherd was herding his flock in a remote pasture when suddenly a brand-new BMW advanced out of the dust cloud towards him. The driver, a young man in a Broni suit, Gucci shoes, Ray Ban sunglasses and YSL tie, leaned out the window and asked the shepherd, "If I tell you exactly how many sheep you have in your flock, will you give me one?" The shepherd looked at the man, obviously a yuppie, then looked at his peacefully grazing flock and calmly answered "sure."
The yuppie parked his car, whipped out his IBM ThinkPad and connected it to a cell phone, then he surfed to a NASA page on the internet where he called up a GPS satellite navigation system, scanned the area, and then opened up a database and an Excel spreadsheet with complex formulas. He sent an email on his Blackberry and, after a few minutes, received a response. Finally, he prints out a 130-page report on his miniaturized printer then turns to the shepherd and says, "You have exactly 1586 sheep." "That is correct; take one of the sheep," said the shepherd. He watches the young man select one of the animals and bundle it into his car.
Then the shepherd says: "If I can tell you exactly what your business is, will you give me back my animal?" "OK, why not?" answered the young man. "Clearly, you are a consultant," said the shepherd. "That's correct," says the yuppie, "but how did you guess that?" "No guessing required," answers the shepherd. "You turned up here although nobody called you. You want to get paid for an answer I already knew, to a question I never asked, and you don't know crap about my business...... Now give me back my dog."
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12-16-2010, 04:37 AM
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Just me.
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Join Date: May 2002
Location: West central Illinois
Posts: 590,002
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That ^^^^ did!
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12-16-2010, 06:15 AM
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Yankee in Dixie
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Join Date: Jun 2008
Location: Tennessee
Posts: 4,217
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AZ, in the version I first heard he was a politician not a consultant. It's still funny though.
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"BOY: On a hot summer night, would you offer your throat to the wolf with the red roses? GIRL: Will he offer me his mouth? BOY: Yes. GIRL: Will he offer me his teeth? BOY: Yes. GIRL: Will he offer me his jaws? BOY: Yes. GIRL: Will he offer me his hunger? BOY: Yes. GIRL: Again, will he offer me his hunger? BOY: Yes! GIRL: Yes. BOY: On a hot summer night, would you offer your throat to the wolf with the red roses? GIRL: Yes. BOY: I bet you say that to all the boys!" -Meatloaf
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12-18-2010, 07:04 PM
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Causer of Unrest
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Join Date: Jan 2004
Location: Arizona
Posts: 4,005
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My Christmas pedicure.
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12-20-2010, 05:44 PM
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Manwhore
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Join Date: Jan 2002
Location: Pacific Northwest
Posts: 15,495
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"Who's online" right now.
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Put me on wheels and I'll turn tricks.
Clever? Nah, I ran out of that years ago. But if you find this, let me know, k?
"The road goes ever on..." ~ Tolkien
In memory of my friend skip...
Go then, there are other worlds than these
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12-20-2010, 06:22 PM
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Registered User
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Join Date: Aug 2001
Location: North Australia
Posts: 17,686
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Indeed.
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Calm, quiet, smooth, devastating
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12-22-2010, 01:42 AM
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Missing the Angels
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Join Date: May 2004
Location: South Dakota
Posts: 10,793
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Little boy about 2 or 3 that came in the store with his dad today. He was non stop questions for his dad. Never stoped talking.
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12-22-2010, 06:23 AM
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Yankee in Dixie
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Join Date: Jun 2008
Location: Tennessee
Posts: 4,217
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Smart kid. If you don't ask questions, how do you find answers?
__________________
"BOY: On a hot summer night, would you offer your throat to the wolf with the red roses? GIRL: Will he offer me his mouth? BOY: Yes. GIRL: Will he offer me his teeth? BOY: Yes. GIRL: Will he offer me his jaws? BOY: Yes. GIRL: Will he offer me his hunger? BOY: Yes. GIRL: Again, will he offer me his hunger? BOY: Yes! GIRL: Yes. BOY: On a hot summer night, would you offer your throat to the wolf with the red roses? GIRL: Yes. BOY: I bet you say that to all the boys!" -Meatloaf
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12-22-2010, 08:47 AM
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♦*♥Moderatrix♥*♦
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Join Date: Nov 2001
Location: on top of it all
Posts: 50,565
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Cain.
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12-23-2010, 08:45 AM
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♦*♥Moderatrix♥*♦
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Join Date: Nov 2001
Location: on top of it all
Posts: 50,565
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a baby shower for millitary wives from Ft. Drum that was on tv today
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12-23-2010, 08:47 AM
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Just me.
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Join Date: May 2002
Location: West central Illinois
Posts: 590,002
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My cold seems much better this morning.
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