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  #1  
Old 02-06-2008, 03:51 AM
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Oldfart Oldfart is offline
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Oz culcha.

A peek at what makes an Aussie.





You know you're Australian if.....


1. You know the meaning of the word "girt".

2. You believe that stubbies can be either drunk or worn.

3. You think it's normal to have a leader called Kevin.

4. You waddle when you walk due to the 53 expired petrol discount
vouchers stuffed in your wallet or purse.

5. You've made a bong out of your garden hose rather than use it for
something illegal such as watering the garden.

6. You believe it is appropriate to put a rubber in your son's pencil
case when he first attends school.

7. When you hear that an American "roots for his team" you wonder how
often and with whom.

8. You understand that the phrase "a group of women wearing black
thongs" refers to footwear and may be less alluring than it sounds.

9. You pronounce Melbourne as "Mel-bin".

10. You pronounce Penrith as "Pen-riff".

11. You believe the "l" in the word "Australia" is optional.

12. You can translate: "Dazza and Shazza played Acca Dacca on the way
to Maccas."

13. You believe it makes perfect sense for a nation to decorate its
highways with large fibreglass bananas, prawns and sheep.

14. You call your best friend "a total b'stard" but someone you
really, truly despise is just "a bit of a b'stard".

15. You think "Woolloomooloo" is a perfectly reasonable name for a
place.

16. You're secretly proud of our killer wildlife.

17. You believe it makes sense for a country to have a $1 coin that's
twice as big as its $2 coin.

18. You understand that "Wagga Wagga" can be abbreviated to "Wagga"
but "Woy Woy" can't be called "Woy".

19. You believe that cooked-down axlegrease makes a good breakfast
spread.

20. You believe all famous Kiwis are actually Australian, until they
stuff up, at which point they again become Kiwis.

21. Hamburger. Beetroot. Of course.

22. You know that certain words must, by law, be shouted out during
any rendition of the Angels' song Am I Ever Gonna See Your Face Again.

23. You believe, as an article of faith, that the confectionary known
as the Wagon Wheel has become smaller with every passing year.

24. You still don't get why the "Labor" in "Australian Labor Party" is
not spelt with a "u".

25. You wear ugh boots outside the house.

26. You believe, as an article of faith, that every important
discovery in the world was made by an Australian but then sold off to the Yanks for a pittance.

27. You believe that the more you shorten someone's name the more you
like them.

28. Whatever your linguistic skills, you find yourself able to order
takeaway fluently in every Asian language.

29. You understand that "excuse me" can sound rude, while "scuse me"
is always polite.

30. You know what it's like to swallow a fly, on occasion via your
nose.

31. You understand that "you" has a plural and that it's "youse".

32. You know it's not summer until the steering wheel is too hot to
handle.

33. Your biggest family argument over the summer concerned the rules
for beach cricket.

34. You shake your head in horror when companies try to market what
they call "Anzac cookies".

35. You still think of Kylie as "that girl off Neighbours".

36. When returning home from overseas, you expect to be brutally

strip-searched by Customs - just in case you're trying to sneak in
fruit.

37. You believe the phrase "smart casual" refers to a pair of black

tracky-daks, suitably laundered.

38. You understand that all train timetables are works of fiction.

39. When working on a bar, you understand male customers will feel the
need to offer an excuse whenever they order low-alcohol beer.

40. You get choked up with emotion by the first verse of the national
anthem and then have trouble remembering the second.

41. You find yourself ignorant of nearly all the facts deemed
essential in the government's new test for migrants.

42. You know, whatever the tourist books say, that no one says
"cobber".

43. And you will immediately forward this list to other Australians,
here and overseas, realising that only they will understand.

(from The Sydney Morning Herald, Jan 26, 2008).
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  #2  
Old 02-06-2008, 05:15 AM
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Mayhaps I am parrt Aussie
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  #3  
Old 02-06-2008, 05:21 AM
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"Woolloomooloo" does sound like a perfectly reasonable name since "Goofy Ridge" is used for a wide spot in the road kind of town about 40 miles from here along the Illinois River.

Of course, decorating the highway with sheep (plastic or otherwise), could cause a lot of stopping along the highway for one of our Pixies, don't ya' think.


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  #4  
Old 02-06-2008, 05:25 AM
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You mean the man who put the "oh" in Merino?

The unselfish person whose first thoughts are of ewe?
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  #5  
Old 02-06-2008, 05:55 AM
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LMFAO....that was brilliant OF...needed the laugh

I be definately Aussie!!!!
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  #6  
Old 02-06-2008, 06:34 AM
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Blame the Herald for that, I be but the 'umble messenger.
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  #7  
Old 02-06-2008, 06:58 AM
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Oldfart,

There are so many similarities ...
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  #8  
Old 02-06-2008, 11:00 AM
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And I guess you are NOT even if you do understand ...
Quote:
You know you're Australian if.....

19. You believe that cooked-down axlegrease makes a good breakfast
spread.

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  #9  
Old 02-06-2008, 01:04 PM
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I understand #7 thanks to Grumble's visit. We took him to his first American baseball game. Before the game started we explained the basics....... I got the oddest look from him when I said we would be rooting for the Paw Sox. LOL
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  #10  
Old 02-07-2008, 02:41 PM
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Funny list.

Now if you could just translate about a third of it for some of us "up over", I'm betting I'd get an even bigger laugh...
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  #11  
Old 02-07-2008, 04:10 PM
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http://www.australianexplorer.com/slang/behaviour.htm

Root: Have sex


http://www.koalanet.com.au/australian-slang.html

Root (verb and noun) : synonym for f*ck in nearly all its senses:



http://psy.otago.ac.nz/r_oshea/FUN%20STUFF/oztaboo.html

root vi. 1. To cheer for a sports team. Root is an offensive Australian slang verb meaning ``have sexual intercourse with''. Announcing to an Australian that you ``are a cheerleader, so you don't see many football games because you are in the stands rooting'' will give a misleading impression about your devotion to the team. 2. To grow roots. ``I rooted some plants'' is practised by vegiphiles in Australia. 3. To dig or rummage. ``I was rooting around in my room for the rent money'' is done only if an Australian does not actually have the rent money.
n. An Australian may take the noun to refer to his or her sexual partner. Even so, saying ``I tripped over a root'' will occasion only the tiniest frisson of delight in your Australian correspondent; he or she will understand.



Understand Grumbles odd look now? LMAO
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  #12  
Old 02-07-2008, 05:33 PM
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Quote:
12. You can translate: "Dazza and Shazza played Acca Dacca on the way
to Maccas."

I know who Dazza and Shazza were listening to on their was to Maccas. I just don't know who Dazza, Shazza, and Macca are. Or is Maccas a place?

I knew about the root thing already... my company sponsored an Aussie athlete and one of our office people said, 'I'll be rooting for you!', right before he left for the competition. His eyes nearly popped out of his head.
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Last edited by Aqua : 02-08-2008 at 01:08 PM.
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  #13  
Old 02-08-2008, 03:32 AM
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Maccas = MacDonalds Fast Food
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  #14  
Old 02-08-2008, 08:22 AM
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Shazza and Dazza = Sharon and Darren or Darryl.
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