04-03-2002, 06:06 PM
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dragon mane
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Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: uk manchester
Posts: 778
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the best man
i have been asked to be the best man at a freinds
weding the only problem is the soon to be husband
is an ex and has left left it up to me if we should tell
her she knows i date guys but not that her guy is
one of them so what should i do
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04-03-2002, 06:15 PM
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♦*♥Moderatrix♥*♦
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Join Date: Nov 2001
Location: on top of it all
Posts: 50,566
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I do not think it is your place to tell her. Either their marriage is gonna be based on open honesty or not, but it is THEIR marriage. I say "Don't ask~ Don't tell" I would stay the hell out of it as much as possible. YIKES!!!
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04-03-2002, 06:23 PM
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Pixies Den Mother
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Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: No-Hockey Land, dammit!!
Posts: 11,897
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I'm with Lilith on this. If she's going to find out, it should be from HIM! Stay as far out of it as you can! Do your thing as Best Man and keep your mouth shut about the past!!
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04-03-2002, 06:38 PM
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Manwhore
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Join Date: Jan 2002
Location: Pacific Northwest
Posts: 15,495
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I think he has a right to be open about his past partners IF he wants to, but this is his decision... he's the one marrying this woman. He should not ask you to make this decision.
__________________
Put me on wheels and I'll turn tricks.
Clever? Nah, I ran out of that years ago. But if you find this, let me know, k?
"The road goes ever on..." ~ Tolkien
In memory of my friend skip...
Go then, there are other worlds than these
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04-03-2002, 07:04 PM
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Pixie Groupie
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Join Date: Feb 2002
Location: Scotland
Posts: 415
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I'm with the others, it is totally unfair that the pressure is put on you when it should come from him.
Just do what you've been asked as Best Man, if he feels he should tell more he should do it before the wedding.
Hugs
MissX
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"Excuse me while I wag(gle)"
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04-04-2002, 02:09 AM
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Übber Pixie
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Join Date: Feb 2002
Location: UK
Posts: 235
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Yes, Not your responsibility to tell her. HE's the one marrying her.
Let Sleeping dogs lie i say...
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I hate it when you go.... But I LOVE to watch you leave...
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04-04-2002, 02:33 AM
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I love to eat fish!!
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Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: lookin for fish to eat
Posts: 578
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i agree with all the others. its his choice to tell. if you tell it could prob blow up in your face and then you may lose your friend. i say let it lie.
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A fair face may fade, but a beautiful soul lasts forever
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04-04-2002, 02:44 AM
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Pixies Devilish Soul
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Join Date: Jan 2002
Location: Alabama
Posts: 660
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Don't get involved. It sounds like an honesty factor in someone elses relationship. Unless you two are still playing around I wouldn't get into the situation.
__________________
Deep into that darkness peering,
long I stood there, wondering, fearing,
Doubting, dreaming dreams
no mortal ever dreamed before.
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04-04-2002, 04:22 AM
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Registered User
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Join Date: Aug 2001
Location: North Australia
Posts: 17,686
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Find a really good excuse to not be Best Man and miss the
wedding completely. If he hasn't the balls to tell her, keep quiet
and stay away. Being best man in those circumstances is risky,
with a really good chance to lose the friendship totally.
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Calm, quiet, smooth, devastating
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04-04-2002, 07:29 PM
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dragon mane
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Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: uk manchester
Posts: 778
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thanks for the advice every one your right must be his desition
if he tells her ok but if later she finds out that the best man is
an ex would make more trouble i will have to bow out as best man if he tells her then can ask her if its ok
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04-06-2002, 05:22 PM
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dragon mane
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Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: uk manchester
Posts: 778
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ok he is going to tell her by the way we are not
still messing around would never date some one
who is with some one
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04-06-2002, 06:33 PM
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~Big Tease~
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Join Date: Feb 2002
Location: In my dreams where im happiest
Posts: 2,081
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Well thats good news, hope it makes things easier for you now
__________________
"No lover is worth your tears, and the one that is will never make you cry"
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04-08-2002, 06:25 AM
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Registered User
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Join Date: Feb 2002
Location: Launceston , Tasmania, Australia
Posts: 1,903
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thanks for letting us know what happened. The advice you got here was good so I didnt repeat it.
I told a friend once that his wife was coming on to me. It was honest but a stupid thing to do. I lost a friend, initiated a marriage break up and got the blame for it. I would never do that again. A lesson from the University of Life that I have graduated in
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04-09-2002, 09:40 AM
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HornDawg Cowboy
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Join Date: Feb 2002
Location: Austin, Texas
Posts: 1,678
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So there you have it..................Mums the word.
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04-12-2002, 12:11 PM
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dragon mane
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Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: uk manchester
Posts: 778
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i am going to be best man with her blesings
she came round and we discused it she is now
shure that i am no threat to her and i have
a new freind even got an invite to the hen
night
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