While thinking of laura the other night (as I often do) I finally realized or maybe I should say admitted to myself what most of you have been telling me all along. I did love laura. I loved her the only way I know how to love someone, completely and unconditionally. Also, I admitted for the first time that I do miss her, I miss her terribly. Now as far as the REASON why I loved her or why I miss her, I'm COMPLETELY lost. I don't have a clue to be honest.

The thing that confuses me know is the fact that now that I've admitted all this, I feel worse instead of better. ?!?WTF?!?

Anyways, I'm setting up a double wide and digging pier holes all day long is one hard ass way of making a living. Basically I just wanted to keep everyone updated since I truely believe at least a few of you actually care about me enough to deal with my rambling, lol.

Thanx everyone, I really appreciate everything.