08-29-2009, 02:27 AM
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Just me.
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Join Date: May 2002
Location: West central Illinois
Posts: 590,002
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Hospital Charts
"Actual writings" from hospital chart records:
1. The patient refused autopsy.
2. The patient has no previous history of suicides.
3. Patient has left white blood cells at another hospital.
4. She has no rigors or shaking chills, but her husband states she was very hot in bed last night.
5. Patient has chest pain if she lies on her left side for over a year.
6. On the second day the knee was better, and on the third day it disappeared.
7. The patient is tearful and crying constantly. She also appears to be depressed.
8. The patient has been depressed since she began seeing me in 1993.
9. Discharge status: Alive but without permission.
10. Healthy appearing decrepit 69-year old male, mentally alert but forgetful.
11. Patient had waffles for breakfast and anorexia for lunch.
12. She is numb from her toes down.
13. While in ER, she was examined, x-rated and sent home.
14. The skin was moist and dry.
15. Occasional, constant infrequent headaches.
16. Patient was alert and unresponsive.
17. Rectal examination revealed a normal size thyroid.
18. She stated that she had been constipated for most of her life, until she got a divorce.
19. I saw your patient today, who is still under our car for physical therapy.
20. Both breasts are equal and reactive to light and accommodation.
21. Examination of genitalia reveals that he is circus sized.
22. The lab test indicated abnormal lover function.
23. Skin: somewhat pale but present.
24. The pelvic exam will be done later on the floor.
25. Patient has two teenage children, but no other abnormalities.
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08-29-2009, 04:05 AM
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Pretty 'n Pink
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Join Date: Sep 2008
Location: At the bottom of the great big Vegemite jar
Posts: 12,199
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__________________
Can I drink your bath water can I have your smelly underwear
I just wanna hold it smell it throw it in the air
Can you hold me tight and whisper dirty little nothings when I come
Just don't keep me hanging I've been hanging much too long
Espen Lind ~ Baby You're So Cool
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08-29-2009, 08:09 AM
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1 of 8,213,984,035
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Join Date: Sep 2001
Location: 41.36N-81.32W
Posts: 21,538
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__________________
 PANTIES
the best thing next to cuchie
"If God didn't want you to play with it, He would have put it between your shoulder blades,..... not at the end of your arm"
Except for speculation, we ONLY have NOW and EACHOTHER!
real world of cyber people ~ Pixies ~ real people of the cyber world
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08-29-2009, 10:02 AM
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Pixie's Resident Reptile
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Join Date: Jul 2002
Location: Central MD, USA
Posts: 21,196
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Oldies but goodies.
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On the kinkometer, my kink measures as a sine wave.
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08-29-2009, 11:46 AM
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Yankee in Dixie
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Join Date: Jun 2008
Location: Tennessee
Posts: 4,217
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What I think is funny is on a few of those you know what the person writing was thinking about at the time, and it wasn't their job.
__________________
"BOY: On a hot summer night, would you offer your throat to the wolf with the red roses? GIRL: Will he offer me his mouth? BOY: Yes. GIRL: Will he offer me his teeth? BOY: Yes. GIRL: Will he offer me his jaws? BOY: Yes. GIRL: Will he offer me his hunger? BOY: Yes. GIRL: Again, will he offer me his hunger? BOY: Yes! GIRL: Yes. BOY: On a hot summer night, would you offer your throat to the wolf with the red roses? GIRL: Yes. BOY: I bet you say that to all the boys!" -Meatloaf
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08-29-2009, 05:02 PM
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Naked and in Love
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Join Date: Apr 2005
Posts: 294
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Ahhhh-Hah!!! #12!!! And here I thought I was the only one with that condition.
---kathy
__________________
Two  are better then one!
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